Our Sad Lives

2008-11-18T22:45:00.003+08:00

its good that even though we've all gone different ways, some of us still hang out man. past years were good. highlights of my life, actually. so what about this year and next ? last year during christmas we toasted to having a good run, will we do the same this year ? be it getting madly drunk, vietnam, kusu island or simple coffee, i'll never forget this. thank you, you bunch of crazy asses. haha.

alson

going back abit.

2008-11-05T18:55:00.007+08:00

going back abit...

hows everybody doing? qianzi in australia.. rong rong in arizona.. the rest busy w school and stuff..

hangout soon guys!

what we would do to be young over and over again

2008-09-04T16:01:00.000+08:00

spring comes slowly to this old friend
still i'm frozen, i still live alone
in time memories fade, senses numb
one forgets how it feels to have loved completely

love well, young man, while you still can
once your leaves turn, you wont love again
in time memories fade, senses numb
one forgets how it feels to have loved completely, completely...

is it special when you're lonely
when you spend your whole life
in a studio apartment with a cat for a wife
the seasons, when they call you, do you barricade the door?
are you stubborn?... stubborn?... stubborn to the core?...

is it your way or the highway?...
is it your way or the highway?...
is it your way or the highway?...
is it your way or the highway?...

then the longest winter is on her way
you called her with out knowing it
but now it's too late...

2008-08-11T20:33:00.002+08:00

Hi.

Seems like everyone's moving along just fine, settling into new schools, making new friends, etc.

I just returned from Malacca, was there over the weekend to attend a wedding. It was hardly a holiday, most of the time was spent travelling on the road, but oh boy have i missed that feeling. Just the experience of leaving the country, hitting the road even if it was to nearby Malaysia took my mind off the monotony of life.

Anyone up for another road trip sometime soon? You know who to call.

Isaac

Hey Hey, My My (Into The Black)

2008-08-04T14:57:00.000+08:00

My my, hey hey

It's better to burn out than to fade away

2008-07-26T14:43:00.000+08:00

Are these times contagious
Ive never been this bored before
Is this the prize Ive waited for
Now with the hours passing
Theres nothing left here to insure
I long to find a messenger

Have I got a long way to run
Have I got a long way to run
Yeah, I run

Is there a cure among us
From this processed sanity
I weaken with each voice that sings
Now, in this world of purchase
Im going to buy back memories
To awaken some old qualities

Have I got a long way to run
Have I got a long way to run
Yeah, I run
Yeah, I run

wish you were here

2008-07-15T00:46:00.001+08:00

So, so you think you can tell Heaven from Hell?
Blue skies from pain?

Can you tell a green field from a cold steel rail?
A smile from a veil?
Do you think you can tell?

And did they get you trade your heroes for ghosts?
Hot ashes for trees?
Hot air for a cool breeze?
Cold comfort for change?
And did you exchange a walk on part in the war for a lead role in a cage?

How I wish, how I wish you were here
We're just two lost souls swimming in a fish bowl
Year after year
Running over the same old ground
What have we found?
The same old fears
Wish you were here

2008-07-05T16:22:00.003+08:00

Since everyone's talking bout the trip, i thought i should be serious and boring too and chip in my 2 cents worth. I thought the vietnam trip was above all, a well-deserved break, a celebration of friendship and to a certain extent an eye-opener. Sure they had great coffee, and the trekking was either fun or lame (it depends, if your name is Alson den yea it was lame). But it was to me, an experience of 5 friends going on a trip together, leaving our comfort zones, and having a blast.

It wasn't so much the place, but the company and the experiences which defined my trip.

Mocha and Cheese. (This is the new "Cheers")
isaac

one for the memories

2008-07-01T16:24:00.003+08:00

i dont really have that much to say about the trip, i liked some parts more and some parts less, i had fun that night in the village and the stuff we talked about during our 6 hour train ride, in hindsight it was all good. cant wait to get out of the country again to be on the road. heres one for the memories.

ys

kopi !

2008-07-01T16:16:00.003+08:00

Im sure we all agree on this. the coffee powder we brought back from saigon is wackkkk. it tastes nothing like the above.

2008-06-29T12:17:00.002+08:00

righto.
back from vietnam and arts camp. was thoroughly shag-ded. arts camp was crazy la, everyday sleep at 3-4 and wake up at 7 kinda thing. haha. but fun nevertheless. saying that, the thing i wanna talk about is the vietnam trip.

i thought i'd be honest here. vietnam trip to me was so-so. i mean, it's interesting to see the difference in culture and progress. sort of a mini eye-opener as to what the rest of the world could look like. but it was nothing spectacular. i know isaac and hweeps had fun at sapah. for me, again, it was still nothing much. it's not the first nor even the second time i've been trekking into this kinda region, and the trek is tame compared to some that i've been through.

then what was memorable ? it was the experience of traveling with friends, i guess. the small jokes here and there. little chats we had. exploring new places together. i guess those were the things that i took back with me. in time to come, i'll pen down my thoughts and maybe share with you guys but for now, it's goodbye.

alson

Jean-Jacques Rousseau

2008-06-23T21:24:00.002+08:00

of late the works of Rousseau have greatly interested me. Below is an interesting excerpt from 'the right of the strongest, The Social Contract and Discourses [1761]'.

the right of the strongest
The strongest is never strong enough to be always the master, unless he transforms strength into right, and obedience into duty. Hence the right of the strongest, which, though to all seeming meant ironically, is really laid down as a fundamental principle. But are we never to have an explanation of this phrase? Force is a physical power, and I fail to see what moral effect it can have. To yield to force is an act of necessity, not of will—at the most, an act of prudence. In what sense can it be a duty?

Suppose for a moment that this so-called “right” exists. I maintain that the sole result is a mass of inexplicable nonsense. For, if force creates right, the effect changes with the cause: every force that is greater than the first succeeds to its right. As soon as it is possible to disobey with impunity, disobedience is legitimate; and, the strongest being always in the right, the only thing that matters is to act so as to become the strongest. But what kind of right is that which perishes when force fails? If we must obey perforce, there is no need to obey because we ought; and if we are not forced to obey, we are under no obligation to do so. Clearly, the word “right” adds nothing to force: in this connection, it means absolutely nothing.

Obey the powers that be. If this means yield to force, it is a good precept, but superfluous: I can answer for its never being violated. All power comes from God, I admit; but so does all sickness: does that mean that we are forbidden to call in the doctor? A brigand surprises me at the edge of a wood: must I not merely surrender my purse on compulsion; but, even if I could withhold it, am I in conscience bound to give it up? For certainly the pistol he holds is also a power.

Let us then admit that force does not create right, and that we are obliged to obey only legitimate powers. In that case, my original question recurs.

read my mind

2008-05-06T22:26:00.000+08:00

On the corner of main street
Just trying to keep it in line
You say you wanna move on and you say I'm falling behind

Can you read my mind
Can you read my mind

I never really gave up on breaking out of this two-star town
I got the green light
I got a little fight
I'm gonna turn this thing around

Can you read my mind
Can you read my mind

The good old days
The honest man
The restless heart
The promised land
A subtle kiss that no one sees
A broken wrist and a big trapeze

Oh well
I don't mind if you don't mind 'cause I don't shine if you don't shine
Before you go can you read my mind

It’s funny how you just break down waiting on some sign
I pull up to the front of your driveway with magic soaking my spine

Can you read my mind
Can you read my mind

The teenage queen
The loaded gun
The drop dead dream
The chosen one
A southern drawl
A world unseen
A city wall and a trampoline

Oh well
I don't mind if you don't mind 'cause I don't shine if you don't shine
Before you jump tell me what you find when you read my mind

Slipping in my faith until I fall
He never returned that call
Woman
Open the door
Don't let it stay
I wanna breathe that fire again

She said
I don't mind if you don't mind 'cause I don't shine if you don't shine

Put your back on me
Put your back on me
Put your back on me

The stars are blazing like rebel diamonds cut out of the sun
Can you read my mind

"Read my mind", The Killers

2008-05-06T03:24:00.002+08:00

alright. i'm capulating on this temporary emotional overdrive to say something. haha. just finished watching 'water boys 2'. despite the fact that i know some (which means isaac) will tease me about it, i must say i love this kinda high school dramas alot. so what if it isnt something classy or complicated. sigh. but everytime i watch this genre, i feel inspired and yet sad at the same time. something seemingly simple but deeply meaningful and thought provoking.

went out of my office for a smoke. and i was thinking 'hey, those japanese producers got it right'. THIS IS LIFE. scurrying about our lives, burdening ourselves with so many things we 'need' to do is fine. but it must ultimately serve the purpose of fulfilling our dreams etc. i bemoan the fact that our generation and after has been continuously taught to do things for the sake of doing it. have we lost our soul to the rapidly developing world ? have we lost precious time enjoying life in our so called 'pursuit of happiness' ?

how can a million or even a billion dollars earned ever compare to being together with a girl you deeply love ? or to the love you share between your closest friends ? or even to spending time watching the television at home with your family.

i remember telling yi shen. i believe that everyday will be spectacular. how can it be otherwise ? we're living our lives. we're enjoying precious moments every minute that cannot be brought back - isnt it even more precious ?

watching dramas is sorta an espcapism thingy for me. sometimes i really wish life could be as simple as that. reality is, unfortunately, otherwise. but so what ? just being able to feel alive is such great pleasure. i will never have enough of it. i'm so in lust for life. how may i ever give this up ?

we have crossed into our twenties. how long more is it when we start reminiscing the time we were this young. let our fires not be doused. we shall not be contained. there can never be any compromise in living our lives. let us take it by the balls and never look back in regret. let the world be torched by our presence.

alson

2008-05-05T03:29:00.003+08:00

blog is such a wonderful thing. for those with no time, forgo this post. needed to unwind.

MOTHER FUCKING CHEE BYE.
a bitch called in, my colleague answered. she started screwing him and then wanted to speak to another person. happily i was the only other bugger ard. oh my god. i cant believe this bitch. wanted a fucking 24hr clinic in holland. so we checked thoroughly and there's not one listed. then she started bitching bout how she's an expat and she can get us into shit with one touch of her finger. how she wanted to sue me. how if she's gonna die, it'll get us into trouble. she ended off with asking for my name, and said she'll get me sacked. haha. whatever. my colleague and i were just dumbfounded at how stupid and utterly rude she was la. it's godsdamn 3 am in the morning. i'm trying to do the best i can, if i dont have any listed within the area, i'm trying to give her the next best choices. and even i am trying to maintain the so-fake-and-sweet voice.

you want to feel powerful threatening me ?! you dare, bitch. one day, i swear if i find out who you are, i'll tear you apart. i wont even scream or rage at you. i'll smile into your face while i twist the knife in your guts, then in your heart.

ok. chill-ded. sometimes i cant believe the shit we have to put through. but at least it thought me to be alot more tolerant of idiotic people.

alson

2008-04-28T05:54:00.002+08:00

so many exciting things happening that are worthy of talking about. not that much attention is paid to this blog anymore but yeah. wanted to express my opinions about certain matters like the mas selamat report and it's public backlash which the straits times has 'failed' to pick up and also like the 'chinese vs others' standoff.

but, due to certain circumstances, i decided to let it go. haha. partly the reason was that i was bogged down, troubled by problems ravaging my immortal soul. increasingly i find it hard to ignore the unneccessary and yet insistent calling towards the need for spiritual fulfilment. yet, how can i reconcile with the entity i have been at odds with for these years. how should i go about seeking clarity and maybe, salvation.

went to st andrew's cathedral with yi sheng last night. not an altogether good experience. but at least i was not feeling that unnatural surge of hatred and bitterness. skeptism. disbelief. but no, nothing extreme. had a great time being pensieve and reflective while we walked around dhoby ghaut/city hall area after having a chat at the cathedral and at coffee bean.

i must say, there are big rocks like birthday bashes etc that fills my life. but the little pebbles and seemingly insignificant grains that fill the gaps are also as important. not to be looked down at. haha, just as my almost daily routine of meeting isaac for coffee at ksl.

i think we've reached an impasse. prob reached it some time ago but things were left simmering all along. things have changed. we've changed. to imagine something like in american pie 2 is naive but it would be quite the perfect thing. what do we do with our friendship ? our 'clique' ? especially when school starts. and we're supposedly going to different places. what will remain ?

i hope this does not sound like another lamentation. i'm sorry if it sounds like one, did not meant for it to be this way.

alson

ZzZzZzZzZzZzZzZzZzZzZzZzZzZzZz

2008-04-10T12:42:00.001+08:00

ZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZ

2008-04-07T22:49:00.002+08:00

my two favourite place to hang out: kim san leng and serangoon garden's RK prata. I shall never forget these two places and with that, the two most important people of my life other than my family. In the roman legions, brotherhood was forged from war and hardship. greeks maybe through other not so glamorous 'channels'. So what was our friendship forged from ? i dont know. but what i know is from this moment on i call you my blood brothers. i know i'm not really dependable but i will be there for you when there is no one else. i'll support you, when everyone shies away. call on me, and my blood will be yours to spill. in time, this promise may fade away as many others had before, but while we still cherish each other, i just wanted to tell i'm glad i knew you and that i still know you.

regards,
alson

hmmmmmmmmmmmmm

2008-04-03T23:42:00.014+08:00

It has not been in my nature to give my two cents worth on a subject matter I feel lacking in maturity to discuss, the maturity I refer to being the lack of tenable opinions rather than sagacious insight that only comes with time and experience. I often view myself with contrite when in retrospect I reflect upon my own actions and words that were evoked out of obscurity and blinded by a misled preconception that my right to judge and ideate gave me a moral high ground. If one believes that to see the true nature of a system is to see its flaws, that sort of mentality is contemptuous in my opinion. I believe that with everyone eager to offer their two cents worth, one must have a plan before others are willing to listen. This is not a contest of "the importance of being earnest", at least if we want to be taken seriously and not with frivolity. Notwithstanding the fact that I continue to hold opinions that scarcely penetrate the issue of political organisation, I wish to make a few points regarding people who I view are pale to decry the current status quo.

Firstly, is there anything inherently aberrant about filling top positions with top academic minds? I think not, at least not for now. There is much to be seen from that who excel academically and that transcends intellectual bandwidths. Academic rigour goes beyond textbooks and libraries and even before we even discuss the feasibility of a learning curve like this, we must agree that in our generation it has taken place. To obtain the distinguished levels of academic achievements, one must have endured an exceptional level of discipline and rigidity, asceticism and commitment to ones goal or destiny. It is hardly a feat accomplished by the average person, much less capricious individuals who have not been attuned to maintain composure and focus when under tremendous pressure and competition. The academic is one who has continuously been trial and tested to strive and persevere throughout his entire live. He has succeeded in proving he is capable of endearment in the face of overwhelming emotional and mental barriers.

By what we make out of his 'elitist transcript' in today's terms, he has constantly been in a network of compatriots like himself/herself, and in this circle they continue to reinforce each other with their confluence of ideas and opinions. Even if they fail to make the most judicious choices, they can and will at anytime draw on a repository of scholastic information, which will be their vantage point over the uneducated man. Is it possible to perceive lawfulness from transgression, fairness from impartiality, discrimination from acceptance, foresight from pontification perennially as creatures of err all the time? If that is your concern, then the question is, even in their shoes and with their Harvard diplomas hanging on their walls, will they have the moral high ground? Have they been so esteemed that they are cloistered, only to perceive the society they live in for confined boundaries?

I believe in a saying that "certainty is the cancer of all leaders," and I believe that this saying applies to all who come into power. However that is not reason enough for us to judge our leaders in a less than deserving light. Can we assume and direct an ambiguous intellectual concern of ours at those we have yet to come into contact with? Or have we been too assuming of our perceptions of their precepts and backgrounds, like how we think they have made assumptions about us. Let us not wallow in our ungrounded prejudices and accept the reality of the situation by being proactive. Let us table this peevish crusade of elitism by redefining what it means to contribute to society. Can we not contribute from where we stand? As professionals, as heart Landers and as Singaporeans can we not conceive of our own identity and responsibilities? If enacting change or contributing is only achieved by scavenging a way to the top, that is YOUR ELITIST MINDSET. What is it that you or I can offer to society? If it is just your words and drunk ambitions, save it for your bedtime delusions. "Ask not what your country can do for you but what you can do for your country," and in this context, "ask not what right you have to lead society but how you would lead and how you would contribute," only then, will we achieve a reconciliation of differences and create more opportunities ahead, without a fixation on a bouleversement that will not come in the near future.

ys

2008-04-03T21:29:00.002+08:00

Saw something in the Straits Times today. Thinking back on what it was about made me indignant now. It was about the reshuffling of the cabinet and featuring our PM talking about the brain/talent drain. He used fictionary statistics to show how our students with all 'A's going overseas to study and not returning to fulfill their potential in Singapore. So what are the rest of us then ? Is the other 95% of the population condemned to be just led then ?

I dont think he was being elitist purposely but even if it's a pragmatic insight, i still dont buy it. Lets say i think logically. It is true that we need people with the ideas and brains to develop our society. It is assumedly true that all that the scholars have studied on paper can be translated into wonderful results in reality as well. But is it enough ? Look at the current political scene. Who amongst them can live up to the leadership vacuum left by the old guards ? What leadership ? What credibility ? What mandate to lead ?

The funny thing is that these so called talents are selected through one interview - after the release of 'A' levels results. To be fair, it's not that it can only be through the As that one succeed in the government. But we must concede that they are given substantially more chances and opportunities. It is only fair they are rewarded with scholarships for their hard work (?) but to secure governmental positions through that ? To already have a stable ladder up the ministries ? That is not only unfair, but also making our talent pool stagnant.

Given our rise in stature, we become more elitist. It is in our nature to want the best of everything. But then again, what are the so-called elistes 'elite' at ? That is a pertinent question seeing the amount of time, money and faith we invest in them.

alson, taju kage bunshin no jutsu. randomly blasting reiatsu again. arggh.

2008-03-23T22:29:00.002+08:00

pardon my language but CHAO CHEE BYE.

some singaporeans are reeeeeeally fucked up man. for those who dont know, i'm working at the starhub phone directory now. some motherfucker old man called asking for a number and couldnt pronounce the name properly. so obviously i tot it was some obscure company. tried to help by asking for location so i can search better. then he started shouting and cursing at me irrationally. what the fuck. he's the extreme case la. but alot of people who call can be sooooo bitchy. if you can search so damn well, you wouldnt be calling us right. losers. and you take it out on us knowing we cant say shit but yes sir, sorry sir. cowards.

alson, huffing and fuming like maaaaaaaaaaad.

2008-03-23T12:41:00.003+08:00

right. according to yi sheng, leong (is that how you spell it ?) has left pool junction. sigh. there goes a great man. pool junction will never be the same without him and his satan loves you or sweet masquerade. a toast to the fallen, the devil - he who still carried the light, but in a glass.

anyway, on a different matter. anyone seen the papers on friday ? displaying profiles on the young but powerful people in the governement. maximum age was like 30 but they're all like directors of certain branches or deputies of certain major offices. used to have a certain dislike or skepticism towards them. may seem irrational, haha, it isnt though. but recently i've been thinking and re-evaluating my life again.

i've come to a new conclusion. either i beat them or i join them. my goal is to enter lee kuan yew's school of public policy. it overrides my teaching dream. i will still teach, but for now all my energies in school will be geared towards entering that place first. no more excuses. really man, we're too old already.

alson

haji lane

2008-03-21T12:53:00.003+08:00

Starbucks

2008-03-14T10:30:00.002+08:00

hi buggers, haven't seen you guys for a long time, missing you dudes already. HAHA.

Anyways, a bit of a disclaimer before i carry on:

The following post is merely a form of emo-indulgence, any one who does not wish to have their day tarnished by my emo-centric ramblings, please do not read on.

OK! that said, so you guys know i'm in japan. Can't say its been a spectacular getaway, being stuck with relatives whom i don't normally hang out with and all, there's a prevailing awkwardness in the air, just ain't very comfortable.

But on the days when i'm left alone, i love spending the day in a coffeeplace somewhere(most probably starbucks) with a book in my hand and the whole day to myself. Quite an idealic setting really.

SO! point is this: Recently i've finally bought this book, "Starbucked" and i've been reading it in starbucks! Now before Isaac or Alson accuses me of trying to lead a pseudo-idyllic life, let me say that the combination is simply brilliant. It is most definitely an interesting read, and it prompted me to think about lot's of stuff.

For e.g. Do you know that seattle harbour contains traces of caffeine?! It came about as a result of human waste that were being dumped inside; showing how much coffee were being consumed on a daily basis in seattle alone. For those who are still unaware, Starbucks first opened its doors in Seattle in 1971, and from then on, its sparked off a GLOBAL coffee-craze, and there was no looking back. and BAM! here we are today, where the mermaid in the green logo probably epitomizes 'globalisation' in the 21st century!

Consider this: How was it that 3 chaps could take a commodity such as coffee, re-package it, charge it 3 times the normal amount for coffee, and still achieve a getaway success?! The answer being, they're selling more than coffee. They're selling GOOD coffee, and most of all, they're selling a lifestyle.

Think about it, Starbucks is a global phenomenon now! It may not represent the same thing to every single individual, but still, in our world of increasing social malady, Starbucks has become the quintessential social hotbed of our generation. Case-in-point: Why is it that everytime we meet up, we choose to meet up in starbucks at liat?

I'd like to think that it was not a result of habit; MY habit in particular, but because that's the most logical and comfortable place to meet, to talk cock over a cup of less-whip java chip frappucino. It just wouldn't be the same if we met up for teh-peng or kopi-peng in Kim San Leng in Bishan. You see my point? We're all sold; and hooked on this lifestyle.

Perhaps, for me personally, Starbucks, particularly starbucks at liat has taken an increasingly important place in my life. It seems cheesy, but hey, its true. Look at it from my perspective:

First and foremost, this is where i usually meet my closest bunch of friends to hang out; people whom i am genuinely comfortable around. That in itself is sthg already.

Two, hate to repeat it again, but that place first took on significance because of you-know-who, and to a certain extent, it still does today.

Three, and most importantly, albeit unexpectedly, because of a certain starbucks barista whom i met. That in itself is an interesting story, and i think its time now to share it with you buggers. In 'starbucked', it was stated that the Baristas(in case hwee pin don't know, baristas are the coffee-makers behind the counter) took on an increasingly important social role to their regular customers; they've become more like friends than the traditional employee-customer relationship..

Well, i dunno bout that, but i think i've upped that statement a notch. I've met this barista(female of course *ahem* *ahem*), and did sthg so stupid and foolish on hindsight that i'd probably not repeat the antic again, and under surprising circumstances, gained a friend, at least on my part, a very good friend.

It is difficult to explain how i feel on my part, but the bottomline is, I am so glad that i plucked up the courage to gain an acquintance. I guess its fair to say that she's taken a somewhat special place in my heart. But where do we go from here? i honestly have no idea. What i do know is that after a very long time of darkness, i finally see a silver lining in life. Perhaps its due to my ORD, perhaps its due to the prospect of UNI starting again, but the thing is, wheneven i step into a starbucks, the first person that comes into mind is her; even in japan.

Isn't it strange how all of these stems from just a starbucks? But i ain't complaining.. :]

Right now, i am eagerly anticipating my Macbook, then i can go to liat and lounge all day with my Macbook in front of me.. Ahh.. that is the life. And isaac, if you're gonna say something about that, i couldn't care less. HAHA!

-Alvin

Isaac Laments.

2008-03-10T14:19:00.003+08:00

"Think where man's glory most begins and ends,
And say my glory was I had such friends."
- William Yeats

Hey people. It's been awhile seen i posted something here, well mostly cos alson screwed up the log in username and stuff and of course my ignorance to the changes, hence the MIA.

Today i ORD. The day i've been waiting for the past 2 years has finally descended upon me. Yet, this strange feeling of emptiness overcomes me, and after the initial rush of emotions, i'm back to being lost, clueless.

I enjoyed my time in the Army, but i knew, and i still know that my future lies beyond that. Much as i enjoy the regimentation and my work duties, it never struck me as a viable career option. I've always admired the drive that Alvin and Yi Sheng both possess, the knowledge to achieve in life, and the will to work towards it. It's just something that's not in me, and I can honestly say that much as i try to find it, it eludes me. To all my friends who have secured yourselves a place in the University, i congratulate you and i share in your joy, i wish you nothing but the best, for i know, and i am confident that you guys will achieve success.

I take comfort in Romans 8:28 "And we know that in all things God works for the good of those who love him, who have been called according to his purpose." I think it's time i started to take my religion more seriously, to quote Nickelback/Alvin, i've been far away for far too long. I know that there's more to life than that. And i thank God for faith, to believe in the intangible, for i know who holds tomorrow, and i know who holds my hand.

2 years marks the end. No. It marks the begining of things to come. New challenges, new experiences. I'm thankful for getting by and getting high so far with a little help from you guys, my friends.

A toast to friendship. A friendship that will last forever and a day, this i'm sure.

Isaac.

just a thought.

2008-03-10T00:46:00.001+08:00

there is no good or evil,

we try to become good so that we can survive together.

it is what we do that makes us good or bad.

fri nite sessions

2008-03-04T23:53:00.000+08:00

The start of drunken moments in 2008,with many more to come....

2008-02-28T21:23:00.008+08:00

Well,here are some pics and vids of the light-hearted moments(and drunk as well) we had yesterday with a special guest,Mr Lawrence.Enjoy!

Satan loves you!

Make it 6(1 missing here)!Gentleman,take your mark....

The 6 brave souls,satan loves you deep deep!(borrow a little of your quote,alson,hah)

Well,someone's running away from the action,but u can NV hide!

Going...

Going....

Going.....

GONE!!The truth reveals itself when one is drunk,check out those cutsy pose and the intimate moments together...aha The FINALE!!

The Demise of local politics

2008-02-26T22:08:00.003+08:00

I must admit, i've never been one who's particularly interested in local politics. Indeed, i am not the only one guilty of such a charge, political apathy in singapore affects not only the young, but the general working and ageing population as well. Perhaps one may argue that as long as the basic needs of the people are met(meaning food, shelter), the status quo maintained(referring to the standard of living here e.g GDP per Capita), people generally do not have reasons to be dissatisfied with our government.

And i am inclined to agree. As the saying goes, "if it ain't broken, don't fix it". It is true that the PAP-led government has done a fantastic job - so far. Standard of living is the highest in the region, and amongst the top few in the world, economic growth is strong, with social stability in place. The conditions in which our government has led us to the state we're now in since independence only serves to highlight the remarkable job the PAP-government has accomplished. Any prospective batches of leaders have much to learn if we are to continue our success.

However, looking into the 21st century, we must question the validity of the status quo. While a strong paternalistic style of governance has worked well in the past, we cannot be sure that it will work well in the future; in an environment that brings about a whole new set of challenges that requires a paradigm shift in how we tackle such challenges. Let us not take away the credit of the government-led initiative to encourage more participation from the bottom up. But the fact remains that we ARE still led by paternalistic governance. Nothing has changed.

We can hold as many youth forums we want, but we are not going to achieve the desired result of a mature democratic mandate if we are not going to change the way we educate the young, the way we stifle any form of political opposition, the way the general populace is left to be content with political apathy. I am not a dreamy idealist urging superficial calls for democratic reform such as freedom of the press or freedom of speech. In such prevailing political apathy, freedom of speech hasn't flourished even though the avenues are already opened; nevermind the fact that you have to apply for a license and disclose your intended speech content to the police before you can stand upon a podium in the speaker's corner in front an audience of mynahs. Rather, i urge a critical re-evaluation of how socio-politics is being viewed, and ultimately ignored, by our leaders and ultimately, our generation.

And it is not difficult to see why people couldn't care less about local politics. High standard of living aside, we must understand that local politics has thus far been a joke. Just take a look at our democratic process. Just exactly what voting rights do we have, who exactly are we voting for? Members of parliament? Who can do what? Debate in parliament? Has anyone actually turned on the tv and listen to parliamentary debates? I did. And it was awful. Our elected MPs are talking about gender inequality, simply because if we calculate the overall payouts handed to women, as compared to men, in their life-time, women would be given a staggering S$60 lesser per month than their male counterparts! Shocking isn't it?! And it sure was entertaining watching the bemusement that was so evident on the faces of other MPs.

Our democratic process has been a joke, not because it has been a fallacy, no, But because we have voted Members of Parliament who can't even propose policies in clear concise english without reading off their script, because those who can goes on to debate about S$60 difference in CPF hand-outs, because the carrot dangling at the end of the stick on election day is the promise to install lifts on every HDB storey in Hougang, to promise S$100 000 to renovation works in potong pasir, because we only have the power to vote for representation over S$60, and not to decide who ultimately will lead our country, meaning the prime minister. No, that process would be left to the infinite wisdom of the Current prime-minister *sic* and his hand-picked cabinet of ministers. While we may consider ourselves lucky that we have had two remarkable men at the helm, we cannot assume and take for granted that there will continue to be capable men to lead the country.

History has shown us time and again, that it is not the wisdom of an elite few who will prevail, rather, it is the decision and consensus of the masses that will bring us forward. While it may not have been applicable when we first gained independence, it is time we believe in the notion that ultimately, 'the people knows best'.

It is time we seriously consider a bottom-up initiative instead of just talking about it; It is time we allow the room for political maturity instead of just calling for it, it is time we breed the conditions necessary for social maturity instead of propagating socio-political stagnation.

I do not propose dreams of grandeur, rallying calls of 'yes we can!', let's leave those antics to the Americans. Instead, let us be pragmatic, understand that while we're having it good now, we must be proactive so that we will continue to have it good in our future, in our children's future, and ultimately, their children's future. Change doesn't have to come at the price of conflict, if only we allow change to begin at the first place. Allow political opposition to run their campaign, even though their attempts may be better received on comedy-night, do not crush them with legal injunctions, do not threaten to 'fix the opposition'. Let the people learn to discern the good from the bad, right from wrong, let us learn to distinguish logic from reason, stability from pragmatism, continuity from caution.

Political awareness is still in its infancy in Singapore, and it will continue to do so unless something is done about it.

-Alvin

2008-02-20T11:51:00.001+08:00

alright. for those who have 20 minutes to spare and have an interest in the education system. do look at this. quite good actually, his idea. once you get used to his english. cant seem to embed the bloody thing on the blog.

http://www.ted.com/talks/view/id/66

alson

2008-02-18T13:13:00.003+08:00

Alright, Back to my bumming days. On the contrary to what some may think, I have been looking for jobs ok. Haha. but never mind that.
somewhat related, i have been given so much free time to start reading up and stuff again. so it's not all wasted time.

halfway through a book dealing with the Somalian incident in 1993. sad, really. portrayed a really bleak picture of the UN and US, despite me trying not to judge them. Essentially, what i came to a private conclusion is that i do not think that the institutions are badly flawed. it just takes the few people at the top to make stupid decisions. of course, we only see the depth of stupidity in hindsight. sigh.

A simple child,
That lightly draws its breath ...
What should it know of death ?
~william wordsworth

coincidentally, i finished reading a few other books dealing with the Iraq war. similarities: people who are innocent getting drawn into stupid, meaningless conflicts. sigh. i cant even be angry. the sense of weariness and hopelessness that pervades this world. ironic, that the world seems so fucked up while i am sitting at home in front of my com with a mug of coffee on the table.

sometimes, i wish i dont care. whats the point of caring and not lifting a finger. hell, i cant even do anything in this small country of 4 million. even in singapore we have our own set of problems. only that we dont really care about those now, who cares as long as we live in relative comfort and prosperity right. kudos to the government for keeping us wrapped in this stage.

always also the question of who is to blame. saddam, bush, rumsfield or bremer in Iraq ? Snr bush, Aidid, Boutros-Ghali or Howe for Somalia ? is it the mass or the media ? or the governments ? or UN ? sigh. what the hell.

alson

smoke like A chimney

2008-02-12T23:06:00.000+08:00

Tobacco could kill more than one billion this century: report

Tobacco use could kill more than one billion people around the world this century unless governments and civil society act to reverse the epidemic, according to a World Health Organization (WHO) report released Thursday.

"One hundred million deaths were caused by tobacco in the 20th century," said the report unveiled by WHO Director General Margaret Chan at a joint press conference with New York Mayor Michael Bloomberg.

"If current trends continue, there will be up to one billion deaths in the 21st century," the report said.

"Unchecked, tobacco-related deaths will increase to more than eight million a year by 2030, and 80 percent of those deaths will occur in the developing world."

The study, which provides key data on tobacco use and control for countries representing more than 99 percent of the world's population, recommends a six-pronged approach to combat the scourge.

The strategies involve monitoring tobacco use and prevention policies, protecting people from tobacco smoke, offering help to quit tobacco use, warning about the dangers of tobacco, enforcing bans on tobacco advertising and promotion and raising taxes on tobacco.

"While efforts to combat tobacco are gaining momentum, virtually all countries need to do more," Chan said.

"These six strategies are within the reach of every country and, when combined as a package, they offer us the best chance of reversing this growing epidemic.

Agence France-Presse - 2/8/2008 2:04 AM

soad

2008-02-07T21:26:00.000+08:00

Why don't you ask the kids at Tiananmen Square
Was fashion the reason why they were there?
They disguise it, hypnotize it
Television made you buy it

I'm just sitting in my car
And waiting for my

She's scared that I will take her away from there
Her dreams and her country left with no one there
Mezmerize the simple minded
Propaganda leaves us blinded

I'm just sitting in my car
And waiting for my girl

I'm just sitting in my car
And waiting for my girl

I'm just sitting in my car
And waiting for my girl

I'm just sitting in my car
And waiting for my girl

System of a down - Hypnotise

Hillary's Speech

2008-02-06T22:54:00.001+08:00

The following is an excerpt from Hillary Clinton's super-tuesday victory speech:

"It's the ideal inscribed on the base of the Statute of Liberty in this great city that has overlooked our harbor through wars and depression and the dark days of September 11, the words we all know that give voice to America's embrace — Give me your tired, your poor, your huddled masses, yearning to breathe free — a constant reminder that here in America, we face our challenges and we embrace all of our people.

So today we say with one voice — give us the child who wants to learn, give us the people in need of work, give us the veterans who need our care. We say give us this economy to rebuild and this war to end. Give us this nation to heal, this world to lead, this moment to seize."

You gotta hand it to her, she gave a helluva speech..

-Alvin

Hillary

2008-02-06T22:54:00.000+08:00

a blast from the past

2008-01-03T19:05:00.000+08:00

BRACE YOURSELF, THIS IS NEVER SEEN BEFORE FOOTAGE. I DINT EVEN KNOW I HAD THEM....

my thoughts for christmas

2007-12-25T23:25:00.000+08:00

"all my hopes and dreams in the form of a girl,
and in a smile, she was gone."

christmas day.

merry xmas to all, and to you alson. you certainly have come a long way(religiously), considering your wishing us all a merry x mas. haha. I had fun today, and the song(thanks to iz) 23 by jimmy eat world was so fitting. jamming covers in the attic was whack but we always had fun, being whack. skating boards and kick scooters after gushing down booze & wine, we just redefined 'having a drink and hitting the road'. heh. we never grew sick of the same jokes or games so lets keep going at it.

all i can think of now is that i never lived these 4 years in vain since i had you guys. vietnam ahead! ha.

thank you god for today, for my family and friends.

2007-12-25T14:23:00.000+08:00

First of all, i wish all who still visits this place a Merry Christmas. Just reading Yi shen's post conjured mixed feelings. but i gotta agree with him. and this brings about something with a little relevance - new year resolutions. haha.

alright. although i dont really follow my resolutions but i'll try alright. let me start first.

1. cut down smoking. haha. i'll aim to cut down cigarettes expenditure by 50% in three months time.

2. stop pining for love. it's ridiculous to devote half my energies to think about needing a girlfriend and stuff. argh.

3. earn enough to go to vietnam and hopefully bali before school starts in aug. money cant buy everything, but it's indispensible.

4. formalise my intent and determination to teach. i've been wavering on how and even whether i should teach, it's time to step forward and leave this shadow of uncertainty.

5. stop being a bitch. haha, no more bitch fits, alright.

now that ive listed the few more pertinent resolutions of mine. maybe it'll get you guys to share what you want to accomplish in the coming year. haha. it's been a good run, with certain pleasant and unpleasant things happenning over the past 12 months. but we've grown and hopefully, matured. haha. the ball's in your court.

alson

maturity

2007-12-22T19:33:00.000+08:00

when we were young, we were told that we were matured if we thought about our future and how it would affect the people around us.

being matured was thus, to be "Dong shi".

when we grew a little older and fell in love, our immatured friends thought that we were matured if we could look beyond the immediate hurt to let go of a relationship gone bad. Taking hurt in stride thus came to be a juvenile form of maturity.

As soon as we began to figure out the immediate affairs of the world and talk about them rationally, we developed what some may call, a 'maturing perspective'.

However intellectually slanted our opinions could be, or confident in our demeanours when confronted with the daily burdens of the ordinary man, we realised that a 'maturing perspective' had to go beyond words and proverbs, by actually embracing the realities of the irreconciliable, and set forth to live a life that is driven by a meaning or goal(ambiguously tied to a purpose but relentlessly pursuing a self identity) "Your soul is indeed, in Tolstoy's turn of phrase, a deep dark forest. Even when your goals are vain, your universe is not empty, but full of armorial bearings.".

While many of us skip this epiphany of the mind and heart, all of us strive to exert an influence on others or strive to define ourselves and our lives. Because if we dont, our life will be cycle of repetition, languidity with bouts of ups and downs driven by only pleasure and sorrow. a good friend of mine once told me that if he had to define his life, it would be by the influence he had on people. However 'matured' we may come to be in our jobs and in the perception of our friends, we fail to be a truly matured individual in the very first place if from cradle to grave we neglect responsibilities to our families. Therefore, in spite of all our goals and visions, we are nothing when we realise the dependence we always had on our families. When we seek to understand that our families can be individuals who have emotional needs and we learn to be considerate towards them, we are in their eyes, a 'growing matured individual'.

maturity will come and go and leave us all different points of our lifes. We cannot say that by leading a certain life we have become matured. We must consider the consequence of our actions on others and ourselves and make choices that may be right but not necessarily good for ourselves. It is not how near or far we judge an issue, but from within and outside that we do. By considering the thoughts and circumstances of others while considering our own.

ys

a walk down

2007-12-18T23:47:00.000+08:00

fotos from the past few weeks/months
IZ'S 20TH, binge niteouts, weekly sunday coffee sessions etc

i intended to post the pics from the last few days, but this is gonna end up more like 'the year in pictures'.

some quite happening, some use your imagination*

wah20/CIMG2572-.jpg" border="0" alt=""id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5145344898037390018" />

ps.

alvin, thanks for all the late nite drives home. I enjoyed it.

to all our 'family friends', thanks for hanging around.

to all those who werent there, we missed you.

2007-12-05T00:29:00.001+08:00

As you stumble in the darkness, you can call out His name.

But whose name should i call ?

When you wake up and bask in His glory,

What glory is it when i should wake up and feel no warmth amidst the rays which glorifies Him.

You seek solace, knowing that He will receive you when you're gone.

But what peace and hope is there for me when eternal darkness loom beyond.

Is it an answer, perhaps maybe fear, or a myriad of inexplicable feelings that drove you into His flock.

So how should i seek to embrace Him, when i cant hear Him at all.

Alson

2007-11-02T22:16:00.001+08:00

i went to yi shen's house yesterday, with isaac.
he's leaving for france for holiday with his family.
at his house, i think something that we (isaac and me) saw that changed our night entirely.
it's sad. really. how our friendship turned out. how our lives and goals become so diversified. i think we always knew that sooner or later things will come undone. and so, we are always prepared to accept the situation as it changes.
but i guess not everyone can be prepared for the hollowness and yearning that hits your heart when you look back at the pictures.
every picture we'd taken was a journey in our lives when we were together. i think that it's because we were still presumably sheltered from the reality of having to think about your future etc that we could truly immerse ourselves in that history we made together.
this may seem like the typical reminiscing of 'good times', it could be for all i know. but i felt that i had to express the heartfelt regret that i feel inside. there used to be quite a few of us. and we had a ball of a time together. some of us even went through some turbulent periods of our lives with the support from one another.
now, the people i hang out with are mostly just isaac, yi shen and sometimes johnny or alvin. it's not about the numbers. although i must say it was quite disheartening to see our numbers dwindle.

who was the idiot who said in chinese 'tian xia wu bu shan zi xi' ? faggot.

i didnt want it to end. at least not like this. where's a good fairytale when you need one. i know that deep down me, yi shen and isaac have never gotten over this. we may be angry, bitter or disappointed with certain things that happened, but we came so far together. on the surface we seem to have moved on and accepted that certain things just wont go the way we envisioned it to. but i think we only feel that because there's no way around.
i must admit that i am capitalising on this instance of self pity and emotional overdrive to say something like that. but it cannot be called irresponsible, because in my heart i truly care.
i cant recall your faces anymore. i cant remember your jokes, i cannot remember your laughter, nor your tears. i cant remember you at all. and all we have left are just photographs. and the saddest thing is that i can only manage to scramble back scant memories of what happened.

on something related, but not totally ...

if you read this, you know who you are. how could you do this to us ? after all our time together. you were our brother. do you know how much i defended you and vehemently believed in you ? i can relate to your strong desire to lead the life you dreamt of. but is it worth sacrificing our trust and our friendship ? with a single lie from you, you have severed your ties with us. or do you even care ? have you been blinded by your new found 'friends' and common goals in life ? you know how much it hurt me when i realise that you made use of our friendship and it pierced through my heart to see you nonchalant about it. i cant even imagine how much damage you've inflicted on your ties with yi shen. he was always there for you. and you can lie through your teeth even when we seriously were worried for you. maybe yi shen wont share his anguish, but i will.

you asked me for a thousand dollars. you could find it in your conscience and heart to ask me for that amount. you knew my circumstances. i couldnt even summon the will to buy a new pair of shoes after more than a year. i am not dirt poor, but i'm not even reaching the middle range. i could only provide you with a hundred. with implicit trust. never mind that i had to scrimp. never mind that i had to carry that emotional burden when my parents asked and i told them i blew the money on drinks. but i believed you were in trouble. can you imagine how much it hurt when one of my closest friend did that to me ? i remembered when i was pressured to spend $130 on something that was totally bullshit. you sat there and appeared as if nothing happened. you led me to the slaughter. even when i told you how i had to work like shit to earn that money back, you didnt even bother to say anything. you paved the way into the lion's lair with lies after lies. and to think i believed you and followed you in. i wish you all the best in getting to the top, but i regret to say that i wont be enjoying the view with you.

regretfully,
alson

we are un unremitingly greedy, stupid, misled.

2007-10-20T02:13:00.000+08:00

imagine,

to be one with sin and indulgence,

the world your palace of desire,

the elixir to all your deepest cardinal wants.

a world where nothing is unabiding...

and you cast away your clinging conscience because,

you are indebted to no earthly or heavenly creatures.

your pleasurable experiences are not averse to boundaries and conditions,

but limited only to your imagination...

the invisble man, a boyhood fantasy?

the most exalted awe inspiring status you envisage,

bequeathed upon you,

luxury, fortune, and ample abundance of wealth..

all you dreams materialising.

the liberty to indulge in the most raptuous sex,

intercourse with multiple partners in the most delectable of settings,

all who seek to fulfill your deepest fantasies,

and succumb to your dominion,

confounding your senses and bewildering the corners of your mind with the most penetrating pleasures.

society at the feet of the world you call for your private amusement

no one would blame you because all deeds in time are reversible,

propriety and reason eclipsed and relegated in this sequested domain,

guilt will abscound you to open the floodgates to paradise.

and you could wish it all away when disenchantment has glutted you.

would you fear and refuse it, perceive the offer to be diabolically dark,

or would you renounce god and ties,

for a taste of what this might be if only for a fleeting moment?

if so are we innately good?

"Philosophy teaches us to feel uncertain about the things that seem so self evident"

period

YS

2007-10-09T12:04:00.000+08:00

'Strindent calls to bring down the regime showed a lack of understanding of the problem. It cannot be assumed that, out of the ashes, a new resplendent Myanmar will automatically rise. That the old way persisted in by the military governement since 1988 cannot work is clear. But the way forward is not so clear.'
-George Yeo, Singapore's Foreign Minister

hear hear ! i found this in the review section in Straits Times today. It really brought to my attention the complexity of the stand-off between the militarised govenment and the people. It also very briefly outlined why we should not act rashly just because of our judgemental values. Myanmar cannot do without the strong arm of the military. The entire structure of the state is held together because of its resolute military stance. In order to facilitate a peaceful and smooth transition, there must be a reconciliation between the military and the civilians. If not, the occurence of another Iraq may be possible.

But i like the start of the above mentioned para. For most to keep calling for strindent action taken against Myanmese government would be detrimental to the state's health since it's so precarious already. Yes, the Junta are opressive rulers but they are also key to the survival of the state because of the different disillusioned and disgruntled ethnic minorities in Myanmar. It should be something that is solved diplomatically, not dramatically.

Taking a look around the intenet and in the newspapers. I see the outrageous comments from many in the international community. Outraged at the Junta, outraged at the international watchdogs, outraged at even their own governments. Again, i question - Are you so sure that what you have is that best solution to the problems ? or better yet, do you even have a plausible solution ? Before we get so disillusioned with the UN, ASEAN and etc. have we understood the problem in Myanmar and weighed all the possible repurcussions of any reaction ? We are probably not the best of people to criticise the instituitions because we have never been in their shoes before. They may have been creations based on global ideals, but even ideals can be halted in front of obstacles.

Saying that, it is not that we have no rights to voice our opinions. We should vocalise our disapproval of certain issues pertaining to human rights etc. but when we do so, we must simultaneously check ourselves that we do not get too emotional and lose our objectivity. If we lose our objectivity, our voices becomes dull and we lose credibility. And then we become a nuisance, something which we never thought we'd become.

'We want Democracy'. Is it something we can decide for them ? Is it something they can handle based on their level of mental maturity ? Democracy is theorectically good. It provides the sense of peace and security, enables the people to start enforcing changes that will benefit the majority. Is that true ? Who is clamoring for Democracy ? The ordinary people, but is it by their own volition ? Aung Sun Suu Kyi and the political monks are the two most featured characters behind all the protests and idealism. Thus far, we have not even established the legitimacy of their ideal of a democratic government. It may not be truly what the majority wants but what they blindly rally behind because they may not understand the underlying politics. So how are we going to justify any means of intervenation ?

Provision of support directly in any channel could be seen as imposing our will upon the state and infinging on their sovereignity. How best then can we stick our hand into this beehive ? We speak of Democracy, but is political or military intervenvation morally right ? Democracy by itself is an ideal, but to enforce Democracy on another state (even if it's because we sincerely want to help) can be a form of imperialism. It is irony.

There are so many political, economical, social and moral backlash if we were to consider serious action against the Myanmese government. In what position are we to have considered all the possible options, reasons and ramifications to decide on any form of reaction ? However, we cannot forever remain hesitant about our views. From whatever limited knowledge we garner, we should still be vocal and if we truly believe in ourselves, then be persistent. The important thing we should take note is to always be objective and keep an open mind.

alson

2007-10-08T11:20:00.000+08:00

haha. i fianlly picked up a copy of the Straits Times after like months, ok , my father picked it up for me but i read it. sigh, there's so many issues in the world that are unresolved and more crops up or reveals itself almost everyday. but allow me to draw your attention to what a small group of youths think about crisises such as the Myanmar 'incident'.

'the people of Myanmar are a sincere group, grimly optimistic even as they struggle to work and survive in a tightly strained society. as the military tightens its iron grip on the monks and civilians, i am appalled by the way the global community is reacting.'
-danielle hong, 20

and pit this against

'to help the Myanmar people, we have to go beyond our superficial viewpoint of their country and fully understand their cultural perspective and grouses of all parties involved.'
-tabitha mok, 21

both are taken from 'youthlink', a forum in Straits Times for youths to voice their opinions. which of the above arguments would you agree with ? moral debates have never cease and probably would never since the start of human self-actualisation. my favourite topic of discussion always revolve the question of whether we are 'moral' enough to do this or comment on that. haha. i agree with tabitha. before we act on anything, we must make sure firstly that we are not acting on impuslse, it cannot be a reaction. if we react, we only direct our attention and foucs to the immediate source of concern and not the overall picture.

what we do when we react is that we are only satisfying our own worries. we are not doing the people in myanmar a favour. what we do is only to assuage our own guilty conscience. i am quite sure that instituitions like United Nations have thought of what we thought and consider the possible actions and ramifications even more thoroughly than any of us. but i believe they are hindered because of the obstacles most big organisations will face. it's all the political agendas and etc. it's a natural phenomenom, you cant stop it growing in such orgianisations.

lets say if we tighten sanctions. who would suffer ? the despotic government or the ordinary citizens ? yes. we can try and starve the place. we can tear their economy apart. there's so much the global community can do. but to what benefit of the people ? how many more must starve or die before the myanmar government finally feels the pinch ? for how long can we isolate them before it is deemed enough ?

on the extreme, what say we invade ? what if we pressure the government using military intervenation ? again, are we willing to risk the lives of our own people to help others ? imagine if your brother or father has to go into the battlefield in a war of 'liberation'. for instances like the war in iraq, what has singapore done ? we send supplies, we send our military in. but to do what ? support and security. yes, the element of danger is present, but have we sent our own guys to the front line ? how are we to argue in favour of such actions when we are helpless to provide the essentials.

so what are we to do ? are we going to sit back and let it become another piece of news. and carry on with the degeneration of our generation ? (bad pun =P) people always mention about wake up calls. like 'i also hope that internet activism in myanmar and the outpouring of support from all over the world will serve as a wake-up call to all governments who abuse their power' (i hope i am not misunderstanding his insinuation. haha.) the time for calling for governments to wake up their idea is past. governments are always awake, just that maybe their policies and what the people accept may not be aligned. i dont have any proposals or bright ideas, but i feel that i order for the people to pique the attention of the governments or global watchdogs, we must have something plausible to present in order to be taken seriously. if not, we'll just be taken as angsty, reactionary teens. or adults, for some. haha.

alson

2007-10-01T18:02:00.000+08:00

i will admit that i'm not a person who's like damn studious and likes to read everyday and thus keep in constant touch with the global situation. i only knew about the myanmar crisis like today. haha. but did a little reading into the situation because i felt guilty about not knowing what the hell was happenning.
it really opened up a lot of new things and perspectives which i never really bothered about these 2 years.

"It had never occurred to me before that Ghandi's political activity and the exit of the British from India might not be causatively related - we just assume that they are."
John Francis, Lauderdale, Tasmania

like it can even link to such issues which happened decades before. history never dies huh. i would think that alot of singaporeans are really ignorant of what goes on in the world. i take example from my immediate surroundings, which is my camp. if i put it into statistics, like 40% of the people in my camp doesnt know and care about the situation in myanmar and probably another 40% who wont treat this seriously.

'your best bet would be to ask the leadership of the United States and Britain to do another one of those "Invasions for Democracy" that they seem to specialise in. This time, because there is no oil in Myanmar, (did the name change escape your attention?), they may even have some credibility.'
annonymous

right. i see that there are still some people that are really disillusioned and skeptical about american policies. this brings about matters which i just want to bring up briefly. first is the idea of a government exploiting another state for its own selfish purposes. it is wrong ? i must agree with many others that it is. but if we take a look at america's ever burgeoning trade deficit and etc. would you fault them for making use of the situation for their own good ? if you had the power, would you be tempted to use your power for the good of your people, while of course, at the expense of others ? another point is that, how much of experience and knowledge would we have of the government ? of course we wont agree with certain issues, and certain consequences these issues created but are we in a position to argue with the guys in charge ? we are. but with that said, we do act in a advisory position that we are an indicator of what the government should do. ultimately, the choice should reside with the government because they have access to more knowledge than we do. they see in more perspective than we can. i must add that, this is the ideal situation of which the government works - that it takes into account different needs of the state and act after careful consideration.

its the same situation that happens again and again. like in the case of zimbabwe, darfur and etc. i read this line in an article online but cant find the source already, it said something about the sympathy and attention span of the world, generally. it uses a caravan as a metarphor for the above mentioned, because it travels and never stops at one point for long. so like now we're so focused on myanmar just like how aware we were of iraq some time ago, but it'll die and move on to another crisis happening on the globe. i'm not going to criticise this, but i'm just questioning the modern human mentality. i think we find comfort in critisizing certain unacceptable situation. and in doing so, we have done our job and can carry on with our daily lives ridden of guilt and responsiblity. we expect governmental and global bodies to take up the responsibilty and show results which match our expectations because by virtue they were charged with the power to enable changes. i feel this way la, dont know whether you will agree with me. haha.

alson

2007-09-28T20:01:00.000+08:00

i guess some of the people here will feel or felt that we are being mediocre. like, we hae what it takes to achieve something more than what we have now, but somehow the situation never permits us. we're like stagnant, unable to proceed to the next step in life. we're 20 man. and like look at the newspapers or magazines which feature prominent figures who made it big even before the age of 20, be it celerities in the hollywood circle or young computer or financial wizards who reel in cash like nobody's business. even in our daily lives, like you feel envious of the scholars in your school. like, they are on the path of bringing new and significant changes to the society (presumably, since they get excessive privileges), then we look at ourselves and wonder what the fuck are we doing.
sigh. we certainly have the potential to stand on par with them or even outshine them. we always keep to ourselves the very nagging question of why are they there in the spotlight while we're like stuck with the other 90 percent who can only watch ?
i cetainly feel this way. one way which most people would feel is that, i'm comfortable where i am, it's not like i have to do something extraordinary to feel happy. true. happiness of course varies from one and another and if one is happy with living an ordinary life, by all means he should be entitled to go ahead with it.
when the awareness of me living in mediocrity struck me, i stood at a crossroad. i could go with the above mentioned mentality and stay ignorantly happy, or i can try to make something out of my life. and now, i can say that
i am still at that freaking crossroad. right.
anyway, it brings me to another topic dealing with National Service. it is a matter of significant importance for guys cos we are compelled to spend 2 years serving our national service. i must say that there were times when i grumbled about having to serve NS. i was frustrated with all the little nuances and major screw-ups in the military. i was even tempted to 'keng' my way through these 2 years. but i constantly evaluated my feelings and experiences.
people are always complaining that NS is a waste of our time. like, dude, if you feel like it's a waste of your time, it surely will be. you can defend yourself and say that you're doing sai kang or your vocation is like basically brainless etc. it is a vicious cycle - the situation gives you an impression, you take that impression and generate a matching response and it results in the same situation which will happen again. and again. until you ORD.
i always try to tell my buddies in camp to look at things differently. look, you think that whatever practices are wrong or ineffective then try to be in a position to influence change, or at least minimize the damage done to your immediate surroundings. i always get fucked. i always get sai kang. and then get fucked again. but do you hear me bitch and bitch about it ? i do. but only when it's really getting to me. mostly i portray a look of indifference and give the impresion of having a good life. you look like shit, you make people around you feel shitty. why give yourself unwanted trouble ?
people always complain about camp food. i agree that it can get really bad sometimes. then dont eat. if you complain about not having the opportunity or financial means to buy outside food, then eat it. i admit that i cant survive financially if i buy food from the canteen, so i tiam tiam and eat the food. voicing out your petty frustrations serves no real purpose other than to give rise to others making similar remarks. so yes, tiam tiam and eat your food. one time when my coursemates were bitching loudly about the food, i told him in the face that if he sincerely feels that he cant eat it. then dont. he glared at me, but he kept quiet after that.
unknowingly, army can show others who you really are. if you are truly mediocre, then you will engage in endless bitching etc etc about army and yet nothing comes out from you - even if you are a scholar or prominent figure in society. deep down, you're still as base as anyone of us, maybe even worse. if you want to make something out of it, then just deal with the little incoveniences and at least show some character.

alson

My first French Poem.. haha

2007-09-09T08:09:00.000+08:00

My first french poem... haha.

La soleil dans tes yeux
La musique dans ta voix
Le charme dans ton sourire
Ta presence dans mon coeur

-Alvin

2007-09-04T18:57:00.000+08:00

"and it will be lost, like tears in the rain"

2007-07-18T18:37:00.001+08:00

Dear friend,

It is not so much to oppose you that i ramble on with such caustic remarks, but i direct what i said to the world in general. Dont you feel like you are perpetually besieged by all these information and outcries of so many people ? Be it in the media or in your social circles, there always seem to be so many 'pseudo greenies'. I'm wary and weary of such gimmicks and lame, self-induced guilt.

I would not be so presumptious and arrogant to call you naive because i do see the point you are making and i respect you for being matured in what you say. I am merely sticking a 'warning' notice after your post because what you talk about would normally induce people to think but not to understand.

Most times, i am not so sure whether to pity those who are ignorant or those who remain ignorant. Like i love to say, which i quote from Terry Pratchet 'You see the light at the end of the tunnel, but is it the light of salvation or an incoming train ?' People starving for enlightenment are quick to jump at every chance to prove their 'mettle' but fail to heed the faint rumblings of the consequences looming ahead until too late.

Anyway, not in the right mood to storm around and scream my heart out here. So, ciao~

Alson

2007-07-17T21:34:00.000+08:00

It is not too late to believe in man,even when some choose not to believe in God.

- Yi Shen

It is an irony, even though i'm sure you didnt mean it this way, when you concur that we can still believe in man even if we dont in god. Of course, i am in agreement when you say that humans do possess the potential to do good. However, it will never be enough to repair te damage done to earth and mankind. The monstrosit has always been escalating, but over the decades either we've been blind or turned ourselves blind to it. How many times have we in our minds thought this way 'It's ok, we have time to do it tomorrow' etc. We caused these problems, We ignored them, and now suddenly the world is full of people starting to feel indignant that the earth and people are sufferring from such indescribable madness.

This is something we must be aware of. Dont you agree that most of the times when you watch clips or videos showing the sorrow and pain of those sufferring in silence or those being silenced, you feel the pangs of maybe ... guilt, and you go like 'what the fuck is the world doing ?' what the fuck is the world doing, you say. You are essentially a fragment of this good earth. You are a citizen of this civilisation. And yet you blame the world for all that has gone bad. We all (me included) subconciously throw the blame onto other factors. You are right, Your family and friends are right. Every other soul unknown to you in the world is wrong.

I have never been particularly active in promoting the awareness of the global situation. I have a faint inkling of whats going ... the earth's dying ya da ya da. Crap. If everyone who rambles on and on about such issues are so sincere, then why are we still sinking into this mire ? If activists were so damn brilliant, then why all that i can see them do is wasting time and money lobbying for this and that change, making a bloody nuisance of themselves and still not get things done ? Impratical, self centered and arrogant. YOU THINK YOU CAN CHANGE THIS WORLD ? What kind of justification have you got to say that you can even come close to understanding what kind of pain has been inflicted on those victims, or the enormity of the wound that we have opened on earth. You blatantly display pictures of suffering victims and etc, but how can you do that with your morals intact ?

Can you be responsible for those people you talk about ? Can you save them ? Can you grow back a million trees in your lifetime ? Can you help the world breathe again ? Dont tell me that you are the catalyst for the reaction that will come in the future generations, only that YOU WANT TO BE.

Of course, there are individuals who sincerely strive to make the world a better place, who wish to right the wrong we did. But dont you get sick of the commercialisation and 'fashioning' of the ideal to improve the 'sanctuary' we live in ? Albeit the fact that this channel of propogating ideals and awareness is effective but it also blocks people from truly accepting and internalising the very reason why they feel the guilt and pain. It always the question of whether you are doing this for the good of the world or for yourself. We all are capable of moralising and self-reflecting, but in what sense ? To act on the selfish impulse to eradicate or to stifle that momentary flash of guilt ?

I am ignorant of alot of on-goings in the world, though not intentionally, but nevetheless inexcusable. But i do not make myself to be a greenie and the one-man activist that alot of people try to be. All i can say is : we are humans, by that very fact, we are also unfortunately ( or not ) mortals. How can we compete in this race for time ? I do not know and i do not presume to know. All i can say is, good luck, Man and good night.

Alson - the hypocritical, randomly blasting reiatsu yet again.

My past revisited

2007-07-14T23:20:00.000+08:00

I gaze once more into those eyes of amber
Feelings so familiar and so sweet
Her face it bloomed like a sweet flower
And stole my heart complete

A moment in time within that hour
Memories that'll never recede
Affections revealed in a subtle manner
And my heart begins to bleed

The setting sun, the evening glow
The distance grows apart
The setting sun, your face aglow
I reach for you and find my heart

It's moments like this, if you must know
My mask begins to fray
I've hidden my love, put up a show
And now its time to pay

With a heavy heart, I walk on by
I turned and look away
Your parting face as my lullaby
I forced my tears away

I revisit once more those eyes of amber
Memories so familiar and so sweet
Her face it bloomed like a sweet flower
And stole my heart complete

-Alvin

@ the coffee place

2007-07-13T16:24:00.000+08:00

Guys, i know this is suppose to be a class blog, and i apologise for indulging in my own ramblings. I jez really needed to get it off my chest, so please, skip this post, and pretend you don't see it.

Ok. so here i am, at the starbucks joint(not surprising) which was formally Hello!Singtel, and i'm jez sitting here, with my cafe latte(as usual) and a laptop in front of me. I'm finally getting to watch this fantastic show, 'Before Sunrise' which took me 3 bloody weeks to download on bittorrent, you know, basically jez chilling.

But here's the thing. It wasn't supposed to be this way. Right here, right now, i am supposed to be hyperventilating, my thought process filled with all the 'what's gonna happen later' on my big, momentous, once in 2 years meet with you-know-who. But here i am, all by myself, jez chilling. As usual, the big 'date' which i envisioned amounted to nothing because i was stood up at the last min once more. My only consolation? at least the movie is good.

Before Sunrise is just a movie that chronicles the journey that two souls take and how their lives, for just one day, became entwined together as their paths crossed each-others. what set this movie apart from all the other chick-flicks is this: It isn't about the sex, or the money or the magical coincidences between two people as portrayed in most chick-flicks, but rather, all this movie shows is 2 very different people, coming together and just talking, learning about each other, and you can feel the attraction between them without it being literally translated to you by the actors; you are free to intepret what love, and chemistry means/represents to you.

Imagine this: Is it really possible for 2 complete strangers to hit it off immediately, with this invisible connection and chemistry binding them both? Is there really room for such a spontaneous relationship in our practical, reality-driven world? I honestly don't have the answer to that question. I would like to believe in all the ambiguity of life, you know? Fate, Love and all the other bullshit. But you have to admit that life, or love as portrayed in the movies are just a fairy-tale.

But, as i look to my left, reality gives me a little hope that all the ambiguity that's protrayed in the movies does have a little truth. Seated right next to me, are two people, jez having a drink. They're jez talking, but their body language jez gives it all away, jez like what i was watching in the movie. He's shifting his body uncomfortably, smiling like a complete ass, while she is jez sipping on her frappucino, ankles-crossed, not willing to make eye-contact. They seem self-absorbed in their own little world, in their own thought process(no prizes for guessing who they're thinking about), and even a complete stranger like me could sense their attraction.

I dunno, maybe i'm jez rambling on and on about this emo-bullshit, but there's sthg i see and can relate to that i can't really explain. what i see in the movies, and what i saw jez now brings me back to a little experience i had, an experience so unforgettable, that it is still etched deeply in my heart and in my mind. An experience which i was looking forward to re-living, but evidenly, i came out short.
I know what it feels like to jez spend a good hour or two with that special someone over a cuppa coffee. and i've been yearning to re-live that experience ever since.
Every single moment we shared is still remembered in vivid clarity, as if it only took place the day before.

And these memories, though beautiful, haunts me every single waking minute. There are things i would like to say everyday, but i can only say it once every 2 years or so. And i am so afraid, that i am never going to get the chance to lift this burden off my chest. It's particularly painful when you hold something or someone too close for too long, and there will finally come a moment when you have no choice but to let go.

I am still waiting for that moment.

-alvin

back to spore!

2007-07-08T10:18:00.000+08:00

hey 04A5, i will be touching down in spore on 29 July 2007 at abt noon. seriously, i m looking very very forward to come back. haha, looks like u all had been meeting up alot. well, not too good to stay at one place for too long when u r in ns. haha. anything u all wan me to help check out in tw? if u do, tell me fast. Any sports stuff by 13/7 (Friday). i dun live near big cities like taipei, i live in a quite rural area. haha. but next sat, i shld be gg to shop for some sports stuff. my hp is still workable. still can sms me. haha.

Take care and see u all soon.

-JL Tan
-Taiwan

the inevitable

2007-07-06T22:08:00.000+08:00

The meaning of inevitable to my perception would be: It will happen simply because it cannot be avoided. This topic crossed my mind when Yi Shen, Zhi Yang and me were discussing over certain issues in gardens one fine night. It appears that we have not yet come to any conclusiveness to what we discussed. Since this issue has been in the back of my mind for some time, so i decided to do something about it, which is what i'm doing here.

Perhaps most would recall the once popular love song titled 'Come What May'. The simplest of lines to describe the irony and ambivalence of the word 'inevitable'. The general public would agree on certain common things, facts that are 'inevitable' i.e. Death. So let us examine the inevitable-ness of death and some pretty logical reasons why we should or should not fight this 'Death'. It would be, to me, one of the easiest to talk about since it will happen, it cannot be avoided and simply because it is the extreme example of what we would call 'inevitable'.

Most would say that we dread dying but we are incapable of fighting death so we live life to the fullest and die contented in the knowledge that we lived meaningfully. That sort of thing. We fight death everyday, every single moment in life and in every breath we take. I know this sounds lame, but, by the virtue of the fact that you choose to keep breathing shows that you are fighting death. People always say that you cannot dont breathe, it is innate and an instinct. Exactly the point, You forget the fact that since you have the natural ability to keep sustaining your life, you are designed to fight death. Look at the littlest of things that you do each day. You only cross the road when you feel sure that you wont be knocked down by a car. When you sit in a fast moving vehicle, you feel exhilarated and yet uncomfortable at the same time because you fear for your life. So, when initially you are meant to fight the 'inevitable' death whether conciously or not, there is no question as to whether you should fight the 'inevitable' but the question is 'Can you ?'.

Let's move on to something less extreme. Let's talk about hope. In a match against an opponent who has again and again beat the crap out of you, do you still go in with the hope that maybe this will be the day where they slip, where by some miraculous intervenation, God finally lifts his hand and crush those opposing imbeciles ? Most people would. Even if all facts and statistics point to the inevitable-ness of they being better than you and thus foretelling quite certainly that they will win, you still hang on to the hope of overturning their winning streak. Hope is a poweful characteristic of human beings, gentlemen. As long as it still burns in you, you will keep fantasizing that fate will change in your favour.

Time is short, it compels me to cut this short. However, i do not want you to go away with the feeling that 'Alson is talking crap again'. Examine yourself, examine what you do each day. When you take that intake of air, examine again. You are entitled to disbelief what i say, or to treat it as lame since i am talking about things which sounds ... lame. It is essentially because you feel this way which is why you go about each day without really understanding 'Why do it ?' But, it is something to talk about another day.

2007-07-03T19:02:00.000+08:00

i hate ppl who sprout out good english all the time. i do i do ! *nods fervently*
but what you posted reflected exactly what i feel about us guys (us, that is me, alvin, yi shen, isaac, johnny, hwee pin and i hope meh meh). you guys are the first for me, in terms of alot of things. haha. i so do not want to talk about what things i meant, but most of the guys would know.
lately, even though all of us are going through NS but we have not yet lost our deep and thick bonds. *cough cough* sigh, i really cant help myself, but thats why everyone of you love me right. haha. alright, wont crap anymore. wont count this as an actual post, lemme go and slowly work out my vocab and stuff first and i'll be back.

alson

whoopie doo dah

2007-07-03T18:12:00.001+08:00

Disclaimer: This entry is purely rubbish. Please do not read on if you do not wish to have your brain cells decimated by the mindless babbling of an emo-centric freak.

ok, since this blog is seriously sliding into oblivion, i shall heed the words of my wise friend, YS, and start off with my first post on this forgotten blog.

On hindsight, i'm grateful for the friendship that i've forged with several members from 04a5. what seemed improbable at first, blossomed into a spontaneity that knows no limits, the very same element that bonds us even till today, nearing 2 years after graduation. we may meet every fortnight or so, perhaps even every week, jez to do the same old damn thing again. basically to chill in some random starbucks joint (not all that random if you think about it. heh heh), and 'suan' each other. Be it on alson's horrible fashion sense, isaac's playa moods, me and YS's never-ending socio-political discussions,johny's hilarious disposition, or hwee pin's emotionally-swayed-ness(haha), its still as enjoyable and comforting as ever.

for those of us who hasn't noticed by now, true lasting friendships are hard to come by. i don't mean to be a cynic, but that's precisely the world we're living in. its hard to find company that you're honestly comfortable with, not needing to put up a false front or to hide behind a mask of hypocrisy. It is unwise to mistake acquintances with friends, and the importance of friends who are there to back you up when you need them, or to give you a slap in the face for a reality check when you need it, could not be exaggerated. we can live in denial for as long as we want, but as the saying goes, no man is an island. ultimately, until i move on to greater things in life, this bunch of guys are my sanctity from self-absorbing cynism and the permeating hypocrisy of society.

hopefully, in the not-so-distant future, we can all embark on the trip we've been talking about. but for now, i think we will all be happy if people actually attend gatherings that people like YS had been organising. To all my ex-classmates from 04a5, do turn up for the next gathering that you've come to know about, you may be pleasantly surprised by the company of familiar faces of not-so-long-ago. It's worth the effort, so make the effort. And to the buggers who has had to put up with my bullshit for the past years, cheers to you! and be ready, cos there's more of where that came from! (by the time you finish reading this post, you'll know what i'm talking about. HAHA.)

-alvin

2007-05-07T19:49:00.000+08:00

i remembered skipping lessons.
i remembered being scolded.
i remembered the stuffiness and sleepiness of the days.
as well as the refreshingness and ligering romance of the nights.
i remembered my fucked up grades.
i remembered ... it was OUR fucked up grades.
i remembered the solitude of the toilets on the fifth floor.
i remembered it was because we smoked there alot.
i remembered the drinking sessions.
i remembered not much of it actually,
because i remembered that 'we' got drunk and wasted alot.
but what i remembered that is most constant about my memories,
are you.
because without you, who then would help me concoct such wonderful memories ?

alson

2007-04-24T22:03:00.000+08:00

Aha,alson,u r forever screwing things up lol!

Fucking shit drunk is not the words to describe u guys that day,i would say wasted is the word to use lo,luckily,was spared from the ordeal,ended up being tipsy,luckily we stopped at 2,if not i will be down next!!

hweeps

2007-04-24T00:04:00.000+08:00

sorry guys. screwed up abit. from now on login name will be cool_newbie@hotmail.com password is the same.

2007-04-23T23:56:00.000+08:00

ok. so we got shit drunk again. this is what we missed out man. life. cheers to the drunken men - isaac and yi shen.

alson

2007-02-16T11:39:00.000+08:00

a glimpsed passed huh.
its a never ending debate. about whether passion can really give you what you want. i believe that passion is a key factor and therein lies the problem. whether the passion is real or not, makes a world of difference. sometimes, you catch the passion from another person, sometimes you feel it for a moment before it dies out. for my part, even if it sounds ugly, i must say something.
i am sure there are tonnes of people who still can make it with their band even with outside commitments such as in this case - national service. i guess it just show how little commitment i have towards stuff, that when it drags long enough i tend to just let go. its not an excuse, i'm describing it as it is. when we started out, i was excited and happy, seriously. even though i am not a person who likes to perform in front of others, i thought it will be fine since i'll be with my friends. since we'll be doing something we all thought we liked.
i admit that the failure of this is not as big a blow to me as it should be. on the contrary, for the past months its been a very sticky problem. on one side there's the friendship involved which makes it hard for me to voice out what i feel. on the other hand, i really dont want to drag on anymore becasue it's something thats turning very unpleasant.
understand this, yi shen. that when i say i give up on the band, i do not give up on our friendship. to say that this will not make a dent in our friendship is naive, downright foolish. however, i feel that after what we have shared, the good times and the problems we have ... even the silly jokes we made, that our bond should be strong enough.

alson

2006-12-05T14:01:00.000+08:00

nice nice???
er my layout abit off.

qz =)

HoHoHo

2006-10-29T18:00:00.000+08:00

wassup ya'll
long time since i posted smthing here.
wow. almost a year since we took our As.
i'll be off this week for an exercise, so good luck to those re-taking their As in advance.
more fun times after u guys are done with ur papers man.
study hard, study smart yea.
all the best.

-isaac.

last time and now

2006-07-16T21:32:00.000+08:00

well, happen to be browsing at the archives of the class blog. surely bring back memories. looking back, a few "sagas" did happen in the class. oh man, how i wish i can get back to the days of bumming ard in sch, the discussion rooms, the fridae-drumstick sessions. now, everydae, i book in n book out, after book out in the evening, dun even have the mood to walk ard. hai, army life can be quite boring and lonely at times. no one in our class is holding the same vocation watsoever. the closest that can get would be being in the same camp, like mi and eng yeow. its nice to see familar faces in the camp, like the other time when i was doing bmt recourse in tekong while guanghui, iz, alvin and yc was doing their bmt.

how are the other ppl doing? the gurls? haha, must be embarking on university orientation soon. haha, i'll join u all next yr. while the rest of the guys, the yr after next. well, frens of my original batch are all counting down to their ord, 16 to 20 weeks to ORD for most of dem, i got 12mths(52weeks). budden looking back, repeating was worth it. i came into a class in my 3rd yr of jc education only to realise wat a real class was. cheers to 04A5

maybe talk abt wat the guys are doing in army
mi in sungei gedong camp (maintance workshop) as a storeman
Alson in OCS (now in stagmount camp for signals officer course)
hweepin having pti course
engyeow in sungei gedong camp for armour spec course
marvin in selatar camp for combat engineer spec course (bridging)
jeremy in khatib camp for arti spec course
clarence in oeti for small arms mech. course (not sure where he having oje now)
fengji in airforce as v200 operator
iz, alvin tan, guanghui in sispec(plc) for their bslc
yc undergoing sea soldier course.

ys n zhiyang working hard for their As (jiayou)

well, all in different places.

ok, maybe gurls update abt themselves. maybe meet up soon la. hope tt no communication break down this time. apologise abt the other time for any misunderstandings. yea, meantime, everyone take care and all the best on wat they would be doing. see u all ard R.E.A.L.L.Y soon! oso wonder if anione still follow this blog. haha, surely hope so.

-JL Tan

world cup finals 2006

2006-07-09T21:18:00.000+08:00

FORZA ITALIA!

'Personally I can't think of a more exciting final than one between my Italy and a French team spearheaded by such an incredible champion as Zidane,' said Italy attacker Alessandro Del Piero, whose glorious finish sealed his country's extra-time win against the Germans.

ole ole viva la azzurri, forza italia!

huat ah to all punters and betters who placed ur hopes on italy as well!

a meetup?

2006-06-24T16:07:00.000+08:00

i wonder how mani ppl act. read up on this blog ever since the class embarks on their individual life journeys....for guys,ns is the next big thing,for girls,uni..it's been quite a long time since the class come back together again and relish the olden days.Just a thought,Ani one up for the idea of meeting up?

a simple truth

2006-04-28T23:45:00.000+08:00

a simple truth is that all beauty must die, all good things must come to an end, all reunions must part, and all that is said before fades to oblivion when a new step is taken, a new social circle, a new life, a new school, a new year, a new future...this is how we move on in the circle of life...revolving till we may meet again, in the exact sense of things, exact state of mind and exact reminiscence of old times.

lest we forget that afternoon in the playground near macdonalds, when only those who truly cared were all present... stood together, to support a friend in need, and reunited in an unbreakable bond of friendship, comfort, brotherbood in the purest sense... that friend was me; i will remember this day till the day i die... and then the rain came down, we took refuse in that little play hut, and the rain drowned our sorrows away . . . . . . . . "the rain drops falling on my head..."

Adios

2006-03-10T16:16:00.000+08:00

Alright this is it. "I'm going in!"
See you all soon i hope.

Love, Peace and Bananas
-Isaac

2006-03-01T10:26:00.000+08:00

halloooooo ...
it's been a long time. most of the guys are in army already, going to pass out from tekong. lucky buggers, u come in one month after me and pass out one week before me.
anyways, today's our results !!!
i know there are some of us who dreads the results while there are the performing ones who are excited and anxious to recieve those slips of papers i dread. it will really be the end of jc life for most.
and i hope that with the result slip u carry away, carry away memories of our class and sch as well.
good luck with the results. everything that can be done is done. watever is there will be final. but dont lose hope if it's not wat u expected. ( or in my case, everything i expect )
haha. so yeah. good luck. with ur results, and with ur future.

alson

2006-02-19T11:56:00.000+08:00

wow, time flies, feburary is gg to be over soon (28 daes nia) and soon march is coming, so is THE dae. haha. yea the blog seems real dead, damn dead. maybe much of u all r bz with work, army and other tings, so did u all forget abt tis blog. yea, hope tt tis blog wld be the channel for the ct to make announcements abt wats gg on and watever la. haha, yea, aniwae, there r some ppl hu realli did quite mia since 21-11-2005 and some since prom. well, maybe a class gathering is on the wae soon. lets see how den. till den, hope tt all of u are doing fine now.

Jian Lin (with a runny nose on 190206)

gathering

2006-01-31T21:45:00.000+08:00

hi, a mini get-tgt on 01-02-06.
venue: bishan mrt station 1030hrs.
events: meet liao den sae

interested sms Jian Lin. now 5 ppl comfirmed.

thanks.

Jian Lin

cny

2006-01-28T05:10:00.000+08:00

XIN NIAN KUAI LE & HAPPY HOLIDAYS EVERYONE.

a short hello from a figment of memory lost

2006-01-23T03:10:00.000+08:00

hey fellas, guess half you guys are out there covered in green now. as for me, still stuck at this place.

wish you guys good luck for your 'A's, may you have many As.

hope to see you guys soon one day.

-Alastair.

2006-01-07T23:27:00.000+08:00

alright. not alone in tekong anymore.
got i think more than half the class guys with me.
hehe. but sian thing is that it's more crowded, i hate crowds.
to those who just enlisted, good luck. endure. or you can learn from me and take mc for five days. hehe. but i was really sick.
anyway, how come i always kena being the gay everytime. now everyone in the bunk is always pointing at my butt crack and all the gay jokes are circulating around me.
-.-" see la, try to liven up the place also kena.
anyway, i suspect we are already drifting away. or drifted. but nvm, i have wonderful memories of ny 04a5 with me. and everytime i'll recall these times when i'm down. you guys are so much better than the 'butto's i get in tekong.
hai, i know this sounds lame. but maybe we can meet up again. and of cos i realise the chance of this happening is very little.
hai. see how bah. good luck for the results tho. in two months time, thereabouts.
if i retain, i'll die, cos half my brain cells already died.

alson

2006-01-02T18:37:00.000+08:00

the fellowship has been broken

Post A lvls Daes

2005-12-15T07:47:00.000+08:00

haha, looking at the previous entires, it was realli heartening. quite a few events happen, so mani sagas. well, tt was all during our school daes.

feel like talking abt army abit here. i felt tt i got weaker after i went back. i drank like 5 - 8litres a dae n i still kana tonsil infection. den now on 2 daes atten c (MC). my mdm is welfare la. then i tink the new PC is nt bad also. lucky for my ny frens who r in the same company also as we look out for each other. oso saw a few of my frens who become sgts n 2lts alr. haha. heng got them, if nt realli sian. somehow, besides the distance, sungei gedong can be nt bad as well.. aniwae, those hu kana armour most likely come gedong la. some sae tt gedong is a sai kang. lol. haha, forgotten tt some of u all still pink ic, while mine is some where floating with fengji's, shaneet's, alson's n johnny's in CMPB. haha..

i kant share much, wait i tio charge. lol.
aniwae, hope tt u all had been having fun at work or watever u r doing. we meet up soon la.
budden situation is either christmas or next yr alr. time is gg to fly pass damn fast. soon we will be back in the sch hall again. till then, enjoy.
take care everyone.

- Jian Lin =D

2005-12-09T02:01:00.000+08:00

Listen little child, there will come a day 
When you will be able, able to say 
Never mind the pain, or the aggravation 
You know there's a better way, for you and me to be. 

Look for a rainbow in every storm 
Fly like an angel, heaven sent to me 
Goodbye my friend 
I know you're gone, you said you're gone, but I can still feel you here 
It's not the end 
Gotta keep it strong before the pain turns into fear
So glad we made it, 
Time will never change it.

The times when we would play about 
The way we used to scream and shout 
We never dreamt you'd go your own sweet way 
Look for a rainbow in every storm 
Find out for certain love's gonna be there for you 
You'll always be someone's baby 
Goodbye my friend.

It's not the end 
You know it's time to say goodbye 
And don't forget you can rely 
And don't forget on me you can rely 
I will help, help you on your way 
I will be with you every day.

Hey everyone. Haven't posted smthing here in awhile.
Been doing a little reflection and i've come to realise how much i will miss 04a5
Ironic that commercial acts like the Spice Girls actually sum up how i feel.
Alson would be so proud of me.

Even as we move on in life, to the army, to university or wherever,
lets make the memories of this class something we can fall back on,
a fortress of strength and hope.
I certainly made good friends thru out the 2 years in 04a5.
I hope the feeling is mutual.
It really is wonderful to know that people give a hoot about your existence.

Till we meet again in March. Goodbye.

-Isaac

so long sweet summer

2005-12-06T17:38:00.000+08:00

So long sweet summer
I stumbled upon you and gratefully basked in your rays
So long sweet slumberI fell into you now you're gracefully falling away
Hey thanks, thanks for that summer
It's cold where you're going, I hope that your heart's always warm
I gave you the best
I gave you the best that I had
You passed on the letters and passed on the best that I had
So long sweet summer
I stumbled upon you and gratefully basked in your rays
So long sweet slumber
I fell into you now you're gracefully falling away
Youth's the most unfaithful mistress
Still we forge ahead to miss her
Rushing our moment to shine
And real disasters ensue
It's cool to take these chances
It's cool to fake romances
And grow up fast, and grow up fast
And grow up fast, and grow up fast

the event

2005-12-06T04:26:00.000+08:00

haha, prom is over. plus the cocolatte party. hope all of u all who went would haf hard fun.
well, tink tt prom is the final event in which we wld be involved in nyjc as students other than the release of the A lvl results next yr. tts fast eh.. time flies.. for mi 9mths in 04a5 had been full of ups n downs, budden with more ups la. i had alot of fun. well, time to pack my feelings n return to ns on 8dec05. haha, other than mi, alson alr enlisted on 2dec05 followed fj enlisting on 9dec05, den eng yeow, clarence, hwee pin n marvin in jan, den the rest in march n april. well, all the best in ny ppl. as for the gurls, hope u had been enjoying watever u wld be doing. n earn more in ur jobs! haha.

hope tt gatherings will be on frequentli. so tt we wld catch up la. haha.

LASTLY, shall end with a realli nice pic tt the guys took at prom. enjoy

all the best ppl in watever u do man. rmb, do it well! haha good luck. hope to see u all ard.

my generation

2005-12-01T06:06:00.000+08:00

well well....all that buzz about prom.. everyone got their prom apparel ready yet? shit mann..i aint prepared shit. but anyway.... first and fuckin' foremost, happy 18th birthday issac. "happy birthday to u.... ur born in the........" okay 4get it.

dude, our frenship sure comes a long way dude, back in p sch, imaginin we were the fuckin backstreet boys, writing porno comics, hanging out w xin zhen and co.... remember kenneth? boy tt dirty son of a bitch is a gd looking aspiring philosopher in our sch now...can u belive it mann. boy i miss those times. growing up w stuff like star wars and mech warrior.........pop culture like take that and bryan adams...........power rangers and futbol............x men and marvel super heroes... magic the gathering and diablo....fighting w rulers in class..... soiling our pants.... anal sex and(oops...4get it) ..... hahaz.... ;x 4 yrs later meeting back in nyjc 04a5 again, all the tight shit and fun we had guys had, crucifying gays, smashing cake on ppls bared naked balls.....checking out gals, cigarettes, booze, cigars, champions league thrill, dexiaoing the indiaN, wahhha.... best lewd humour(im not ashamed), helping me out w my drumkit...... plus the fact few guys like us know rock and roll, old sch bands the way people should, o mann... happy birthday bitch. this is for u. ;) hope i dint disgrace u mann.

nxt, i wanna wish my buddy/bro/gay partner/confidente/party khaki and fellow sex crazed metal maniac w a softspot classmate, ALSON YONG all the best in national service tommorow and dnt screw w ur bunk mates mann. take care of urself and i love u as a brother mann. stay sick and rock on.

shit mann. y the sudden emo. i feel gay. tsk. see u guys at prom stunners.

gingerfish

Prom

2005-11-27T00:19:00.000+08:00

hey guys n gurls, guessed most of us haf alreadi finished for almost a week.
well, next up will be prom.. 5 December.. hope tt those hu haf the tickets will go la.. nan de got the chance to see all of us in formal again since most of us skipped the sch career seminar.. haha, tis time will be a different tone.. more cameras n flashes during tt dae.. we shall haf fun.. maybe after prom will be cocolatte.. lets go chiong b4 some of us like fengji go ns, =X.. haha.. okie.. meantime, haf lots of fun till u drop or ur wallet dry up...

Jian Lin

It will soon over

2005-11-16T09:48:00.000+08:00

We have reached the last 2 papers and it will soon be over and done with....Regardless of what results we might get, it's now a time whereby some fun should kick in to celebrate to end of our tormendous time we have been through for 2 weeks plus.List of activities have been planne(can refer to yi sheng or me for more details...).we welcome everyone to join..the more the merrier,more atmosphere,more fun!!!
Aniways,there has been calls for a chalet to sorta celebrate the end of As and send alson that senaky fat ass off to the dreadful army,hahax...There's no fucking chance to hold it at aloha changi or loyang before alson gets in,who ask him go in so early and people book as early as 4 months back.The location is either downtown east or coasta sands(east coast)dates would most probably b4 1st dec. WE need FEEDBACK,so feel free to tell us when u're free and preferable locations...time's kinda running out,quite rush...so feedback ASAP.need to book the chalet and prepare for it.Shall be overfilled with Booze and Cigars(leave me out of this) and mAke thiS a FUckinG banG!!woohoo...this is the start of the neverending fun we will have...

-ah ba-

2005-10-30T23:15:00.000+08:00

anyways. this shall be the last i'll be posting about the bunch of morons (excluding people like emily anyways ).
look, i'll never be sorry for what i've said. but i'm getting bored of making fun of you guys so i'll stop. see you during general paper then.

2005-10-30T22:46:00.000+08:00

first off. i wanna both thank and apologize to emily.
i always thought that you were a nice girl, and you prove me right. i've taken note of what you said and i think it's fair and true. i thank you because you've put it in the manner which hasnt any implication of snobbishnes, which is rare from what i see in the class blog. and i apologize to you because i didnt mean to include you, norman etc. whom i know to be never what i said below.
but lemme just put it this way. i still think your class has quite some morons inside. it could be wrong of me to name people like that, but i'm being frank from a outsider's perspective. but seeing your post is like a breather to me after seeing all that trash from the rest. i admit i too, sound arrogant when i criticise your class but i am not sorry for that.
i hope they can all learn from you. i should too, come to think of it. hehe. good luck for your exams !

a1a shit heads

2005-10-29T15:17:00.000+08:00

GINGERFISH is me. yi sheng, just in case u dint know.

Gingerfish has been known to be more of an inconspicuous character of Marilyn Manson and tends to keep to himself. Ginger Fish replaced original drummer Sara Lee Lucasin 1995 prior to the band's release of Smells Like Children.

he took on the name gingerfish like other marilyn manson members with their first name belonging to a female celebrity icon and the lastname taken from a notorious male serial killer. 'ginger' is from ginger rogers and 'fish' from 'albert fish'.

first i would like to apologise to a few peeps like daniel, raymond, norman and any1 i mite have known from that class.' u guys are my frens and i sorta forgot to omit ur names in my malicious comments. but for the rest of the class...kelv.... or i duno who....whoever...whoever fucked up and stupid enough to say his not affected by my one line of remarks but responded with a fuckin long post which u prob spent an hour of ur precious but pathetic god forsaken life on earth, tts pretty much contradicting. smack out of it dude. u guys arent so cool & gungho as u think u are. it may seem stupid writing in this blog... but i would tell it to ur fuckin faces if u diss my class again. it u got the balls now that u know who i am...come fuck me in the ass...GAYS

2005-10-29T11:23:00.000+08:00

anyway. i am not gingerfish, but i do know of that person.
and furthermore, i dont like to spoil other people's blogs with not-so-nice words so i wouldnt have tagged anithing bad. but seeing the reply you put on your blog in response to the tag and to my post, you are seriously hypocritical. *pat pat* i am too, but at least i can admit it freely, so it doesnt turn on me see ;)

alson

2005-10-29T10:44:00.000+08:00

alson here again.
before i say anything, i am stressing that i am fully responsible for whatever i've posted. so if you need to address anything regarding this issue to anyone, just put my name on your post please.
anyway, stop romantisicing this issue here. it's not bad blood. simply because i dont even treat you seriously, so why would i care about anything you say except for the fact that it amuses me. yes, i know i sound crazy sometimes, but as i was reading your recent entries again, i felt that it was kinda amusing. why ... cause it shows how much you are still dreaming. of course you wont agree with me, but was just letting you know from an outsider point of view how stupid you guys seem.
look, i refrained from downright cursing and swearing at you for two reasons. one is that you dont deserve that emotional stress from me and second is that i was being very polite already. you havent had a taste of worse, cause i didnt want to break your fragile hearts. stop thinking along the lines of 'oh, i'll not debase myself', i'll not lower myself to this level'. alot of tosh. you're not anywhere above anyone to start with, except for your ego probably. you may try to lace your language with flowery words and phrases, but in reality you are just wasting everyone's precious time when we spend less time and effort to say the same thing. you have to resort to using language as a weapon to make yourself on a seemingly higher ground. but i tell you, i've seen people who are better than you but they keep from using those because ' the empty vessels make the most noises '.
furthermore, you say or imply that i have no 'right' to lecture you on your ego and mannerism. fine. first near-to-clever thing i heard so far. i admit that i have no right to tell you about your flaws, but then it's the internet, and there's something called ' freedom of expression '. i never asked you to stop posting trash, did i ? that is because i respect your rights. and because i too have my rights , incidentally, that is why i can post what i like about your idiocies. if you didnt even take what i say seriously, then why even blog to rebuke. you dont call that rebuking, fine, i'll give it a nicer term - protecting your class. i was just being nice enough to let you know of how others would and could think of your class. and of course, since i couldnt help myself, i made it an insult =).
sigh, look. stop all these 'let's be gentleman' trash. i was in cat high and i had enough of four years of stressing on being a gentleman ( just go past my school and you'll see it all over the wall -.- ) and for awhile when i was in jc i used to think like that. but then i realise that it was stupid because it was something that we all try to make ourselves seem special and it also seemed sorta pretentious. so i dropped it. when you keep telling yourself this, it's actually damn dumb. why do you think you are the only gentleman ? what is your perception of a gentleman ? are you sure you can even fulfill the criteria ? like i said, dont let your ego take you to where you cannot go.
you claim there's no facade. but when you blog and say that you dont care about what i say and 'oh, i still love my class and we're great' and then you go on to counter all the points i've listed, it's damn fake lah. and i see the way you guys talk and act, it's also damn *rolls eyes*. it's not only my opinion, i wouldnt dare to act on my own impulse ( actually i do but yeah ) but it's after hearing from different people.
and what's with all that shit this and shit that ? implies you are actually bothered by what i say. congragulations ! and it's damn 'tiaong' when you keep saying shit with such an angry tone ( tsk tsk ) and then go on to tell everyone in your class that you are a gentleman. look, i admit that i too have so many of my own flaws, but i wont hesitate to list them out if you want. and yes, i do love my class. but i think that every other class is as great and everyone is as great too. i would never dreamed of putting my class above everyone else. but it's because i like my class very much which is why i call it a great class without the tone of 'we are better than everyone else' of course. it's one thing to be proud, like i said before and another to sound like you're better than everyone. we are all different because of our varied circumstances but when it comes to potential, who really knows ?
of course, while saying all these, i know it's a wasted effort on my part because you'll simply resume your 'oh god, i'm so good and so are the rest of my classmates' routine. it's like being a bimbo without the looks, which is very very turn off *pat pat*. but anyways, nice knowing you. ( that was also part of being polite, hehe. )

2005-10-27T20:36:00.000+08:00

ouch alson, very ouch.

2005-10-27T19:34:00.000+08:00

alright. i didnt want to do this. because i wanted to be nice and not burst people's bubble and because i was too lazy. hehe.
the issue i am referring to is not any of our class conflicts nor does it involve anyone from our class. i believe everyone is too busy mugging now anyways, so no time for clashes.
i am talking about 04a1a's class blog. when i saw it, two reactions came to my mind. one is the 'tiaong' feeling we get when things are really moronic and the other is the i-cant-believe-these-people feeling. i am talking about things in general of course. there are peope inside whom i think are still nice but because it's their class so they go along with it. look, if any of the a1a people read this, this is not a case of me being mean just cause i'm jealous. this is a case when an objective and neutral person goes to your class blog, look around and am truly irked by what you write.
let's just talk about your title dealing with something about your class being the best. it is a typical case of ego feeding ego. really. i know you probably wont believe what i say anyway, but please do take offense at what i say. it'll show that you can actually understand. many of you people are very wrapped up in your dreams. yes, it's true your class performed well in the prelims and the tests before it. but no, it's not due to your brilliance or your remarkable knowledge. i'd like to think that i am helping you guys by waking you up verbally before your ego makes you suffer later on in life. you think you people are very special, that's what you think. most of the people around are sometimes embarassed but mostly annoyed by what you say or do because it's either very irritating or embarassing. anyways, back to your studies. hey, dont think you are great because you scored well, come try our combination and we'll see how you do. it's not an excuse for my class to do badly generally but i tell you what, i've seen many of my classmates struggle very hard against the odds and i am proud of them not because of their grades, but because of their effort and resilience. i wont say something as irresponsible as 'you have got it easy because your combi is easy for you'. but let me say this: your combination is definitely alot easier to do than ours.
to be fair, different classes have different aptitude and passion for different subjects. i say this which is very true, 04a5 is a class where people are interested beyond normal lessons, what we each pursue are definitely more meaningful than just scoring. take me for example, i like to learn and explore more of the human pysche because i want to help my students when i become a teacher. if we score, we are pleased with our hard work. we do not go around boasting that we are the best class with amazing students. it is one thing to share the pleasure of succeeding together but another to act all smug like you're better human beings. on the contrary, i think it makes you lesser of a person because it shows how much pride and ego has eroded away your virtues. anyway, i've looked around and saw your 101st post. yeah, the clothes are nice alright, but are your class people good looking enough to wear it ? please, i beg of you, if you want to think you're so clever, you can because you can still lie to yourselves in the immediate future. but dont think you're glamorous or gorgeous in any way, it's revolting. at least have the semblance of mind to note that people can read and it really turns people off ( people who know you, anyway ). i dont mean that you are hideous or anything near that but dont let your ego take you to where you cannot go. i myself am not even good looking, maybe even less than average but i accept the reality and i never would dream of boasting myself as being gorgeous. it's good to dream, but you must remember to come back to reality. if you are truly good looking, even the worst of clothes cannot take away your looks. to seek something that we all know and you know you dont have ( even if you are not aware ) can seem materialistic and stupid.
dealing with my 04a5's conflicts. yes, it may seem all very nice for you in your dreamland that you've never quarrelled in your blog. but hey, my class is very open. we do not hide our agendas in class. whatever that happens we talk it out. i agree that some of our discussions have not been very constructive or objective. but let me tell you this, it's reality that conflicts happen. it's simply a case of different personalities. it's not like we're less nice people than you are. if you spout that kind of nonsense in my face, i'll ensure that you will not be able to talk for one week, at least. do not insult my friends. they have some of the better personalities that i've come across in my life. and i tell you, because of our conflicts and clashes, we better understand each other. we've seen the darker and uglier side of evryone. to be friends, just like one another for their nice-ness, but to become true friends we have seen and embraced one another's uglier side. not everyone of course. but we have each found great friends that will be true to one another. so no, i dont even envy your class at all. i pity you people, in fact.
anyways. am too lazy to continue on the rambling. not worth the effort to say anymore. you'll probably ignore it or most possibility erase it from your memories since it couldnt have happened since you are such a great class and all. lucky i dont get to see any of your little moronic acts in sch anymore.
on a lighter note. it's nice that you're such great friends. but after spending time with some of you, i doubt you are really true to yourselves and to your classmates as well. for your own sake, i hope you change.
for my own class 04a5, persevere on pumpkins. for the sake of your future and dreams.

alson. look, go on and hate me. at least it'll mean a few more people will remember me. i'll really like the 'popularity'. and not like i'll bother myself with you -.- ... and oh yes, you owe me something for wasting my time writing about you and yes, feel free to rebuke me. i love a good argument.

2005-10-15T17:44:00.000+08:00

I have here one retouched photo. Click if you want it, I don't know if it'll still work if you want to develop it since I cropped it, but it's at the original resolution.

I'm sorry but I do not offer pimple and eyebag removal services, all that was changed were colours and focus.

-FJ

2005-10-13T20:36:00.000+08:00

college life is over.
for now at least, who knows whether i'll have to return for another year if my grades dont make it.
countless people around the world constantly put themselves through this rigorous system of education. in search of a better future for themselves. all of us here included. dont people get tired of all this competition, of the endless need to propel themselves to a greater height ? we cant settle for the simple but neccessary things that makes our life worth living.
i think, in this 2 years in nanyang for me has been worth living. though i've met with more failures than success, i believe the lessons i've learnt made me even more aware of myself. and i've made friends. really great pals and gals that made my life here the best it could ever get.
i know it sounds naive to say that in the end grades dont matter, but for me i think it's true. wats the big deal about those 4 As anyway ? if one can achieve that, congragulations, if not, no point to keep thinking about that. count your blessings instead. instead of counting your As, count how many friends you've made. instead of thinking how hard it is to get into whatever university, think of how far you've travelled with your friends.
i think in the end. we all die. all the certificates matter not in the end. all are just pieces of paper. but the things you go through in life make up the pieces of your heart. which would you choose, the paper or the heart ?
although the graduation ceremony was abit turn off at times or most of the times, i think there are still some parts like the video clip or something someone said in a speech that caused a twinge in your heart and that you'll remember.
i think that if your grades are average, be happy. not contented, but pleased. you may not have hit high grades, but think of the 100 plus others who've scored lower ( including me ). by looking down on your grades, you are implying that you look down on those who've scored worse. so yeah. try to look at it on the bright side to motivate yourself to work harder.
i've seen people cry during graduation day. i myself was also very moved by the sadness in realising that we are finally leaving this chapter. flashes of memories fly past. first day i stepped into the atrium, ushered by the ogls. till now. fast aint it, how time travels. that now we're all on this crossroads again. the similar one we were on after the o levels. some of our paths may cross, some lead to places so far we may never meet again. but you know what, at least we've been given this chance to have met. even though our journey together has been rather short, our times together has been etched forever in my heart.
my friends. i bid you farewell. i thank you from the bottom of my heart. for being a part of my life, a part of my memories and a part of my heart. the next 20 days will be gruelling. but persevere. because if you do so, it makes your reward even more glorious, even more lasting. we live only once, but if we play it right, once is long enough.
remember, you're never alone. even in your darkest days, there is always a way out. have faith, stay strong. and let us walk towards the glorious sunset in the horizon into our seperate futures. goodbye.

alson

2005-09-21T21:42:00.000+08:00

life goes in rounds.
now i'm here talking on my own again.
i remember saying this - i'll always be proud of catholic high, but it's nanyang jc that i'll miss.
my most abject failures. my most treasured friendships.
it's near the As. nearly goodbye.
some of you i'll never see forever.
hah. i'm always the first few to say goodbye. just in case. i dun want to be buried along with other goodbyes, but rather one that people actually can hear.
it's been both a long and short journey. short now that it's going to end. long because of the times i had.
some may treasure this class more. some less. cant be helped.
but at least our paths have crossed.
drinking, lannin,checking out girls and studying with the guys have been great.
used to chat with some of the girls too.
sorry didnt have much chance to interact. but i sure will remember you girls.
in any case. study hard for watever u're aiming for and good luck.
try to keep in touch ya.

2005-09-09T13:22:00.000+08:00

and you know what.
i talked about what i feel ( with regards to incidents in the class ) here.
i dun blog and accuse in my own blog. and i dun purposely check other's blogs to spy for information.
sources that i use are what i hear from people.
i wasnt one of the few who started accusing, so dun tell me to cool down. i am retaliating because everybody is being idiotic. and i want to make clear my stand on this.

2005-08-31T21:43:00.000+08:00

and look.
who were the ones who started approaching ey first ?
ppl like yi shen, hp. then became me isaac and marv.
you tell me it's cruel, it's stupid to start some vendetta. i dun see anyone else doing something. everyone has only been following what we have started. we never meant it to spread. but people followed at their own will. so dun fucking say we start some exodus against him. it is very annoying when people keep blaming us but not taking initiatives, but on the contrary they also follow us.
we can justify because we tried to befriend him. but we found out that we still couldnt get along. if he keeps following us, we can only start avoiding. but have you done much ? or enough ?
less rubbish talk, more action please. very noble intentions most have. act on it. it's wasteful to let so much talk go to nothing.
and dun fucking tell me you want to close this. if you dun wanna read, dun read.
no one's forcing you. this was my idea that isaac made into reality. i've begged for months for people to talk here.
if you delete this, i'll destroy you. i've been a crappy assistant ct rep. but outside of class i've done some bits. i took over for clarence when he started missing. i held 2 chalets. and still lost and owe money for the chalets. couple of other stuff. so there, i may forget alot of ct stuff, but i did care alot for the class. did. until i realised, to my disgust, that people have so many of their own concerns.
go fucking focus on your studies. i'm sure that's all you'll ever achieve - things on paper, but never in reality.

alson ( and the previous post is mine too )

2005-08-31T21:28:00.000+08:00

and i forgot.
i'll crucify the next person who bloody changes the password on their own.
you can change your passwords of your own blogs till you die of boredom. but this is public property, not something you can change at will to suit your mood.
pissed ? fine, trash it out here.
if i think you are being unreasonable, i say it here.
for every thing, except one, i've been open and talked it out here. i accuse. but i blame everyone on generic things.
not specific groups or people.
i dont mind outsiders taggin, and go ahead make stupid comments. it only shows how stupid you are. you are only a minor pain in the ass here that we can delete. but at least put your names, if you cant be not stupid, be honest.
sometimes, i feel so pissed that i really can murder.
you feel i am over reacting or that i cant justify wat i said, tell me. i beg of you. let me have the chance to rebuke the shit out of you.
i may have little excuses sometimes, but i guess that most has even less than me. selfish, yes. just like everyone else.

2005-08-29T05:04:00.000+08:00

look. enough.
it's been a while since i last posted.
but i see what's going on around here.
enough of accusations.
enough of bitching around.
enough of this immatured shit, really.
people.
whatever others have said or done, may it be good or bad, no one has the right to scold anyone.
and to those who think you are victims of this, wake up.
i know somethings that some of us guys are doing arent nice. cruel even. but if anyone really feels so magnaminous, then you can go tackle the problem yourself. we cant justify what we do, maybe. or it doesnt seem right to any of you. but have you considered whether you have really put in any effort to really understand why we do these ? and do you think you can really comprehend our reasons ?
we dun take pleasure from doing this. but we cant help it. we extended a hand and realised we shouldnt have. have any others extended their hands ? - for those who are pissed at us.
for any party who feels like they are being maligned, just cool off, ok ?
frankly speakin, i dont really care about any class spirit thing anymore. i have my own group of friends in class and i'm contented. but this thing of people accusing and scolding everywhere and very very annoying. at least if you cant be friends, be civil.
and understand this important point that i always stood by, dun scold others if you yourself are guilty. you may think others are not objective or reasonable, but are you ?
there is no wrong or right.
i dun wanna hear any more of this trash. go slap yourselves stupid in a fight. watever. just let it end once and for all.

alson

cONFeSsSiOn t2 mEe BabBeE

2005-08-28T17:07:00.000+08:00

I tiNk EnG yEoW iS vErIiI cUt3e lEhX hEhExXxx! sO cHarmIn!!!
Yy U aLLl sOoO0Oo bAd 2 hIm OnE! dOnT BuWeeE mY yAnD@oOoXxXxX t3DdYBeArR BeArzz *WiNkZzZ*

xoxoxo
Ur MySt3RrrYyYy Li@nZzzz =p

2005-08-20T12:12:00.000+08:00

I do not know who deleted my post, and neither do I want to care, but this concerns what I wrote. However, I would like to clear up the misunderstanding of myself accusing Xinhui and Yongcheng of ‘launching a mass exodus against Eng Yeow’ as seems to be the common misperception, since I never suggested that, but merely said they were actively perpetuating it.

Yongcheng: There are some people in this class that are playing this game. And to me, some people are meant to be criticized. Eng Yeow is one of them.

Quite frankly, I will not try to persuade a class that is so evidently swayed by Xinhui’s ineptitude to understand a simple passage and her almost immediate ill-driven cause to ‘garner support’, shall I put that lightly. However, I will comment, that if you have not the basic mechanic ability to discern what is right and wrong, then people like Eng Yeow would suffer in emotional solitude indefinitely. I only ask for 04A5 to be civil to each other. That is all.

2005-08-16T09:00:00.000+08:00

"You know. I don't quite get it."

So leave it at that.